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To kiss her feet 

A very acidic tongue 
Waggled in her head 
Life was lots of fun 
At times I had to smile 
In front of everyone 
We seemed the best
green tail that
Could kill a whale
That waggled in the deep blue sea


And the mermaids looked so beautiful
As they swam around by the shore
But this
waggled
But I need someone just to give me a mic here
What I'm doin' right now is a practice
But you have to know that its part of my hygiene
And I'm
hand upon her quim, she said, 
"Young man you'd better put it in."
Chorus

So I put it in and waggled it about, she said, 
"Young man you'd better take
waggled it, it rang the fireman's bell.

Refrain.

And if you don't believe me, if you think I lie.
Just ask the folks in Derby, they're bigger liars than
that reached right down to hell,
And every time he waggled it he rung the old church bell.
And indeed, my lads, it's true, my lads, I never was known

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