Song parody of
The Dollar $tore
by Rock Despot
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Fresh off the boat in America
First place Father took me was the dollar store
Never seen a place like that before
Somethin' motherland did not offer
Pretty soon I had a new set of toys
And a new look too, hard to recognize
Loaded cap gun in my Batman fanny pack
Spandex shorts, bow and arrow on my back
The happiest immigrant on the block
I had a thing for shades too, I even got
The ones Arnold rocked in "Terminator 2"
My building's maintenance crew nicknamed me Hollywood
Ah-ah
Then came a time when I didn't go
To the dollar store very much at all
Was too busy pretendin' that I'm not poor
Tryin' to fit in with the preppy kids at school
And as my bones grew, they grew in shy
And a dark root took hold inside
I dressed up as the Crow three Halloweens in a row
I stashed my drugs in a hollowed-out Bible
Oh-ah, whoa, ho-ah
Me and my two friends playing on this song
After high school we moved to Montreal
We got a place that needed a makeover-haul
And that's what made me return to the dollar store
Dust masks, rubber gloves, scrubby pads
Paint rollers, paper towels, garbage bags
Heavy duty brush for the toilet bowl
In two weeks the place was livable
Then we got into gettin' novelty
Items for our birthdays, shows, and parties
Hand-clappers, streamers, and confetti
Black balloons for when I turned 30
Jesus nightlight for the kitchen wall
A picture frame for "Gremlins" Gizmo
The laundromat is a far-away walk
And sometimes I just need a fresh pair of socks
But now the items at the dollar store
Are priced at a dollar or more
Guess things couldn't stay the same forever
But they're still the best deal on toilet paper
Fresh off the boat in America
First place Father took me was the dollar store
Never seen a place like that before
Somethin' motherland did not offer
Pretty soon I had a new set of toys
And a new look too, hard to recognize
Loaded cap gun in my Batman fanny pack
Spandex shorts, bow and arrow on my back
The happiest immigrant on the block
I had a thing for shades too, I even got
The ones Arnold rocked in "Terminator 2"
My building's maintenance crew nicknamed me Hollywood
Ah-ah
Then came a time when I didn't go
To the dollar store very much at all
Was too busy pretendin' that I'm not poor
Tryin' to fit in with the preppy kids at school
And as my bones grew, they grew in shy
And a dark root took hold inside
I dressed up as the Crow three Halloweens in a row
I stashed my drugs in a hollowed-out Bible
Oh-ah, whoa, ho-ah
Me and my two friends playing on this song
After high school we moved to Montreal
We got a place that needed a makeover-haul
And that's what made me return to the dollar store
Dust masks, rubber gloves, scrubby pads
Paint rollers, paper towels, garbage bags
Heavy duty brush for the toilet bowl
In two weeks the place was livable
Then we got into gettin' novelty
Items for our birthdays, shows, and parties
Hand-clappers, streamers, and confetti
Black balloons for when I turned 30
Jesus nightlight for the kitchen wall
A picture frame for "Gremlins" Gizmo
The laundromat is a far-away walk
And sometimes I just need a fresh pair of socks
But now the items at the dollar store
Are priced at a dollar or more
Guess things couldn't stay the same forever
But they're still the best deal on toilet paper
