I Recorded This on My Phone Right Before I Gave Up

I lost my reason to live I been so numb and I ain't feeling shit Look at my wrist like what if it was slit Go to sleep never wake up in abyss My life is something you could never get Momma she told me I could never quit Hiding my pain cuz I already did Gave it my all still got nothing to give Distance myself never talk to my fam I don't explain cuz you won't understand Battles in my head don't know who I am I won't go on cuz I know that I can't Life is a bitch then you die Fuck myself till I bleed then suicide Lost all my hope no glisten in my eye Drown in my tears give in to my demise 24/7 I'm always afraid Run for my life like it was a relay Ask how I'm doing I said I'm okay Stuck in my thoughts I could never escape Let me live in this hell Can't save me from myself Even when they pushed me I got up when I fell I'm alone but I still Played the cards that I'm dealt No one even knows me Or the the way that I felt Why the fuck I'm gonna run if I could fly I ain't gonna make it if I never try Remember days when I didn't wanna carry on I coulda gave up on myself but no I'm not that kinda guy I ain't have no hope, I ain't feel alive Appreciate my fans that was down to ride I'm speaking everything about my life into this music So that even if you kill me I would never die I ain't ever doubted myself Even through the hardests times I wasn't down on myself I was running outta gas but I was stuck in a shell Now I'm rapping for the hopeless who be needing my help I said, I ain't ever doubted myself Even through the hardests times I wasn't down on myself Everynight I was alone but I relied on myself Even through the hardests times I never doubted myself Let me live in this hell Can't save me from myself Even when they pushed me I got up when I fell I'm alone but I still Played the cards that I'm dealt No one even knows me Or the the way that I felt Or the way that I felt