MAD

All I know's the universe a reflection of me So I see through the bullshit cause I'm pretending to be Somebody that's happy and has the purest energy But they don't know that the mirror be my biggest enemy When I be the change Imma see the change, what I tell myself Yet a lot of times I think I should kill myself I could give you all advice but I don't help myself Cause I could tell you all to stay alive and kill myself That's ironic but it's true though Iconic motherfucker prolly talking out his culo Don't confront me bout my sadness motherfucker what do you know? I roll solo dolo like a fucking game of UNO Got a lot of kids watching now It'd be stupid if I plotted on stopping now But it's hard when you end up in the lost and found To get lost again, and then they cross him out Expectations only lead to disappointment And this sad boy shit a chance to get your coin in It wasn't cool to be a mess, now it's cool to be depressed I been at war with myself without a bulletproof vest Yesterday was a good day, today I'm suicidal Tomorrow I'll be happy, play my part for the recital Just so I could get on stage and smile, inside I wanna die though Tell my truth and shed my tears so they can tell me "it was fye though" I'm getting mad at myself, I'm getting mad at the world I don't think I love myself, so I cannot love the world I'm getting mad at myself, I'm getting mad at the world I don't think I love myself, so I cannot love the world Crazy how often I be going through the motions Crazy how suppressed I keep all of my emotions Crazy how I'm sinking way deeper in this ocean Crazy how I don't know how to keep my head floating All I want is to find peace of mind Live a life that I'll soon leave behind Where I fly and even the lead the blind Not this life where I can't sleep at night Panicking thoughts they happen to me a lot All these mannequin bots, I fear are part of a plot I'm paranoid and can't trust no one, that's a hell of a cost I wonder and I wander on my path till I'm lost I can't even hit the blunt at times without overthinking Becoming super self conscious, and then I think about leaving Cause everything is too damn much, I'm tired of feeling this feeling I think I'm gonna end it all when I go home in the evening But I never do it, do I? Gotta keep my cool, cause my temper getting too hot All I am's a ticking time bomb that let you watch I already count the seconds, why the fuck I need a new watch? Explain to me that I'm just afraid of to be wack, I ain't complaining in fact My brain isn't intact, I'm on a train with no track My thoughts spaghetti junction, man this traffic is backed So ain't no where to go the only way's a panic attack And I hate that fucking feeling, can't escape where I'm at Because even if I did I'd still be in this body trapped And the only way to kill this feeling's when I body raps But that isn't enough, least they ain't calling your bluff At least you spilling them feelings instead spilling your blood When there's no rope to pull you up when you be stuck in the mud But I can't wait to leave this body, dawg I'm so fucking done, kill me I don't think - I don't think I love myself I'm getting - I'm getting mad at myself I don't think - I don't think I love myself So I cannot love the world