Song parody of

Caught in the Trapezohedron (restored)

by MRJSTAR

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  • English (English)
  • Français (French)
  • Español (Spanish)

I offer the listeners a tale of suspense yet Be warned for it lies beyond comprehension Horrific thoughts wake me up late one night Or was it the eerie light from a Stygian site? No matter, I mutter, and muster, all of my courage Suffice it, reluctance is just a Litotes, I'm quite at ease, descending my stairwell Delighted this plunge seems never ending! My rational self begs to know how A portal has ruptured from right under my house But memories of Arkharm, a tenebrous bout Inform me that logic's not relevant now A downward ascent–on non-euclidean shaped steps! I emerge feeling spent Out of breath, bereft I find myself at the shrine of Nyarlathotep Colossal pillars looked odd: spires of cyclopean Masonry that flanked the Faceless God Oh God! Am I standing at an altar of gifts sacrificial? Curious symbols, fifty cubits wide As if the rock had been riven by some titanic chisel The thought alone makes me bristle A steady drizzle feeds a dank fungus Charnel and foetid, yet shines in its effulgence These arcane glyphs confirm we know where we are We've happened upon the tomb of Nephren-Ka Any sane man would turn back as I intend to do But not yet, we have a relic to pursue! Against my better judgment and will to go home We enter the womb, invade the catacombs Noisome vapours emit an indescribable stench Amorphous shadows suggest another's presence I'm loath to encounter any such sentinel Blasphemy! Such a herald would be most eventful! Said abnormal thoughts will likely make one appear I blurt out through an unnerving miasma of fear What could it be in perverse serenity the guardians hide? Wondrous beings chained to life Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li! Have I gone mad, what was that hideous ululation? Neither Lovecraft nor Poe defined this exclamation Though Pnakotic Manuscripts hint to fiendish elder myths Of Older Gods enslaving the creatures in our midst You mean the Shoggoth from past aeons beyond? Correct, likely defending the Shining Trapezohedron How could such an crazily angled diamond Truly be the window on all space and time? And Was it not from this singular tomb spirited away? Last I recall it was tossed in the Narragansett Bay And not to mention, what of blood sacrifice? Is that paradoxical knowledge worth taking someone's life? And most daunting is the Haunter of the Dark Calling a god from the gulfs of chaos will surely leave us marked Leave the incantations, instead explore your mind The stone will show us what we seek to find While scholars get boggled, scream and squabble We abscond with the paperback novel, and always make sure to follow Every single line–as designed–you should read Take heed, these forces are divine The first letter emerges in the dark of my eyes Then an iridescence that could never be described This gem draws me down a path that seems one way Clearly this untamed realm is far from the mundane Esoteric visions should be left unseen But my curiosity might have got the best of me It's not worth the risk of anguished nightmare dreams That no mortal mind could ever hold within its seams Who'd tear his brother's flesh, I'd not be that man How presumptuous to think we got this far without a plan! Let the Haunter grant us sight, in the deepest of the night Witness life of the cosmos from dawn to twilight Survey constellations across the light years And ascertain the motives that fuel man's deepest fears Let us bathe in the knowledge that grants unfettered power Indeed that gift which demands a tribute of flesh But in the moment before that final wicked hour Our newfound insight will cause time to regress! It's too late to protest, as the beacon now shines The Spectre beckons and we seem to merge minds Gibbous orbs of time of an unknown texture Their nature and form utterly defy conjecture They are large, they contain multitudes Of countless beings consumed by their desire to rule Interminable scenes of past and future genocide Appear the war criminals that all would recognize But unrecognizable, save for a few instances Are the oceans of dolorous faces of victims Their inquisitors, slavers, and despots amass A nebulous pageantry form from the morass Holding candles, they amble to the hand of the phantom Do I gamble with this ensemble, entranced by their anthem? Dare I scramble to the panel and channel annals of power? Dare not, dear companion, for we must turn back the hour Beams of light scintillate, mentally ventilate The nefarious fete? All traces abate That strange mad celebration, that jagged gem And the promise of power at the expense of fellow men I recall the purple vortices of space, the wisps of black mist that flow And a key to the paradox of the arcania of the worlds that we know But all the while I can't reconcile that the secrets slipped my grasp As we trace back the sand rising up the hourglass Horrific thoughts wake me up late one night This time I must return to the Stygian site! Our escape was a rare fortune so let the universe yawn Before we return to glare at the Shining Trapezohedron

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