Song parody of
Chloraseptic
by TheJesterFeste
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Ear, nose, throat, each drain clogged
Expectorate bars through brain fog
Thank God for gatorade and plain broth
Turn a paper towel into a J. Pollock paint job
Shiver in me timberlands, the coldest captain
Till I spike a fever pitch quicker than Aroldis Chapman's
Patronis happens to be a slug in a folded napkin, anyway
Employer thinks I'm over-acting
Never gone full Nic Cage for sick days
To miss pay with bills every which way
Back and forth, hack and snore, wake and pace, check the temp
Back is sore, sat to floor, hate this place, it's never-ending
Extra wimpy, wincing at the slightest touch
And lighting up the mic despite the something-other-itis blood
That drains my very essence like an upwards-drawn razorblade
It's not too much to ask they add a couple Wong-Baker faces
I'm at like a... Twelve
But I'm not the only one
I'm not the only one in the world to have missed out on my favorite band 'cause I got covid
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only one to have suffered a major overdose from reckless use of opiates
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only one of my core friend group left feeling exposed out in the open
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only person on the earth who's been completely overcome by self-loathing
Shit, I prob'ly could've died from it
Thermoreceptors haywire, flummoxed
Every aching step an un-climbed summit
Life in public never my desired cup of
Tea, but in this isolation, any greeting I covet
Biding as my state of mind plummets
Gray matter's gunk, no sign of it
Nine days of waiting for the windup with
Nil but bile in my stomach, still haven't died from it
I still haven't died from it
Ear, nose, throat, each drain clogged
Expectorate bars through brain fog
Thank God for gatorade and plain broth
Turn a paper towel into a J. Pollock paint job
Shiver in me timberlands, the coldest captain
Till I spike a fever pitch quicker than Aroldis Chapman's
Patronis happens to be a slug in a folded napkin, anyway
Employer thinks I'm over-acting
Never gone full Nic Cage for sick days
To miss pay with bills every which way
Back and forth, hack and snore, wake and pace, check the temp
Back is sore, sat to floor, hate this place, it's never-ending
Extra wimpy, wincing at the slightest touch
And lighting up the mic despite the something-other-itis blood
That drains my very essence like an upwards-drawn razorblade
It's not too much to ask they add a couple Wong-Baker faces
I'm at like a... Twelve
But I'm not the only one
I'm not the only one in the world to have missed out on my favorite band 'cause I got covid
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only one to have suffered a major overdose from reckless use of opiates
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only one of my core friend group left feeling exposed out in the open
At least I didn't die from it
I'm not the only person on the earth who's been completely overcome by self-loathing
Shit, I prob'ly could've died from it
Thermoreceptors haywire, flummoxed
Every aching step an un-climbed summit
Life in public never my desired cup of
Tea, but in this isolation, any greeting I covet
Biding as my state of mind plummets
Gray matter's gunk, no sign of it
Nine days of waiting for the windup with
Nil but bile in my stomach, still haven't died from it
I still haven't died from it