Alone by Default

Oh I don't want to be alone I'm scared of letting go Feel the butterflies in my belly they been getting cold and I been playing back my album but it's getting old because I've fucking grown, it's not relatable Flip another page in my diary and I trauma dump Shit been moving steady but slow like no it ain't Ramadan The way I said that you're the one who going to say I'm the one I got a foot out the door but no I can't move on And I based so much of my personality On you now and I'm actually losing myself as I lose feelings I thought I'd overcome this whole calamity but still I'm sitting suffering Like I'm caught up in satans dealings I used to write bout you so sweetly like your majesty oh I might get a cavity I'm tired so I'm just reminiscing But honestly I'm wishing that was still me I'm missing That cause the grass is greener on the other side it glisten And I I still feel these fond emotions in my chest sometimes And I ain't mad at that You lived in my head rent-free it's your natural habitat I tried To leave you behind But nevermind I'll just sing ballads bout the fact that I'm so Oh I'm so alone by default They said that love won't fix you if you can't be alone If so Im fucked it wouldn't ever have worked I'm wondering if it even made sense in the first place And I ain't got a place to call home I don't even belong in my motherfucking birthplace But now that I've written "Without me" I need to find out who I am without you This the end phase Still spend a couple hours a day daydreaming Can't say it don't hurt but glad I have this feeling Because this shit is just sensational, control the gravitational pull Some days I'm on the floor some on the ceiling And I already wrote an album but my lips ain't sealing Just a natural urge to share the shit I'm dealing with And I'm the fucking realest I swear this shit come from the heart I swear this diary is not a myth And I done spent some days in the darkness like a member of the Sith I ain't out of this rut yet but I Will like I'm Smith I ain't done with my rambling, you don't like it you should switch teams 'Cause I knew I'd do this shit since I was 9 I been prepping for this music shit ever since I was 15 And my art is fucking beautiful like Chapel yea I'm talking bout the Sistine (but im) Oh I'm so alone by default They said that love won't fix you if you can't be alone If so Im fucked it wouldn't ever have worked I'm wondering if it even made sense in the first place And I ain't got a place to call home I don't even belong in my motherfucking birthplace But now that I've written "Without me" I need to find out who I am without you This the end phase