Song parody of
Desert Island Questionnaire
by Conor Oberst
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Say that you were stranded on a desert island
What books you gonna bring what friends would tag along
Say you had a month and you knew you were dying
How would you spend your time
What goodbyes would take too long
You don't like this game and you take exception
Who wants all this trouble even hypothetical
With the charging sky above
And the ground below that could swallow everyone
Staring at your phone at another party
Spend a lot on clothes got a lot of skin to show
People in the pool like the drowning army
Smoke along the moats and the hotel lobby glows
Wish that you can dance but you've got no partner
Keep tapping on your glass because you want to make a toast
To the ennui of our times
To the selfishness in everyone you know
Made a lot of friends but they can't be trusted
Don't know what their angle is
Post up at the bar and I’m double fisted
Talking to a mannequin
I don't know what it means when he takes my pulse
And says that I'm a lot like him
I say that's fair enough that's why I'm trying to loosen up
Every lunatic must be well intentioned
Sets himself apart he's an instrument of god
Took her from the playground to the farmhouse cellar
Kissed her while he killed her like a good Samaritan
They finally found her body many Autumns after
Interviewed her mother who said she'd now be 21
And although we lost her young
I know the good lord has a plan for all of us
Mormons at the door they are clean and handsome
Always have a good sales pitch
Your little sisters swears that she can take my order
But I can't take her serious
Need something to bring
For this human nature is not what this condition is
I'm so bored with my life but I'm still afraid to die
Everyone's asleep in this burning building
And I can't wake them up in time
You go on ahead I'll be right behind you
I'm headed to the finish line
I can't ignore the sun until this is over
Pretend that you were stranded on a desert island
What would be the message that you'd spell out for the plane
Say the engine failed when that plane was flying
If you were the pilot would you curse or would you pray
No one's gonna cry at this John Doe funeral
Not a lot to say did it even have a name
Light a candle just in case he was someone's friend
Throw some flowers on the grave
Say that you were stranded on a desert island
What books you gonna bring what friends would tag along
Say you had a month and you knew you were dying
How would you spend your time
What goodbyes would take too long
You don't like this game and you take exception
Who wants all this trouble even hypothetical
With the charging sky above
And the ground below that could swallow everyone
Staring at your phone at another party
Spend a lot on clothes got a lot of skin to show
People in the pool like the drowning army
Smoke along the moats and the hotel lobby glows
Wish that you can dance but you've got no partner
Keep tapping on your glass because you want to make a toast
To the ennui of our times
To the selfishness in everyone you know
Made a lot of friends but they can't be trusted
Don't know what their angle is
Post up at the bar and I’m double fisted
Talking to a mannequin
I don't know what it means when he takes my pulse
And says that I'm a lot like him
I say that's fair enough that's why I'm trying to loosen up
Every lunatic must be well intentioned
Sets himself apart he's an instrument of god
Took her from the playground to the farmhouse cellar
Kissed her while he killed her like a good Samaritan
They finally found her body many Autumns after
Interviewed her mother who said she'd now be 21
And although we lost her young
I know the good lord has a plan for all of us
Mormons at the door they are clean and handsome
Always have a good sales pitch
Your little sisters swears that she can take my order
But I can't take her serious
Need something to bring
For this human nature is not what this condition is
I'm so bored with my life but I'm still afraid to die
Everyone's asleep in this burning building
And I can't wake them up in time
You go on ahead I'll be right behind you
I'm headed to the finish line
I can't ignore the sun until this is over
Pretend that you were stranded on a desert island
What would be the message that you'd spell out for the plane
Say the engine failed when that plane was flying
If you were the pilot would you curse or would you pray
No one's gonna cry at this John Doe funeral
Not a lot to say did it even have a name
Light a candle just in case he was someone's friend
Throw some flowers on the grave
