Song parody of

Blind Date

by Barbra Streisand

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  • English (English)
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Fanny & chorus Smooth the sofa, plump the pillows Dump the ashtrays, oh this dress Look at me I am shaking all over, Shaking all over I'm a mess Waiting wondering what I'll be thinking When he comes walking through that door What'll come walking through that door A man I never saw in my life before Oh, I am so nervous I got a blind date waiting to call on me (any minute now) I got a blind date what am I gonna see (any minute now) Right over there's the doorway, he will be walking through Will he be six foot eight or maybe four foot two (it could happen) I got a blind date waiting to come around (any minute now) Oy but I'm nervous listen to my heart pound Why do I need this headache, single is not a crime I got a blind date An with my luck he'll be on time I got a girlfriend Shirley, who says why not (she's an idiot) This guy is a friend from a friend of a friend she got (hello, how do you do What an idiot) One thing I know is Shirley ain't sitting on no shelf If he was such a vow she'd keep him for herself (it's only natural) She says she is he's nice and he deals in stocks (sounds good, but she's an Idiot) I'll bet a buck he looks like month-old lox (also and idiot) What do I need from Shirley her and her fifty cup I got a blind date and I'm praying he stands me up Wait wait, what am I praying he stands me up, I'll stand him up. I smell a rat Anyway, I'm gonna hide under the bed, he'll never see me, he'll walk in and look Around, I wouldn't be there, he'll go away and that's the end of that. Perfect! Now you keep quiet, not a word you hear You didn't see a thing Oeps there he is! Now quiet everybody sh quiet! Rosalie? Oi, oi, oi Rosalie? that's odd she doesn't seem to be here Smart, smart! I've been stood up, it's news Well it's better than put down This has never happened before What and ego! Rosalie? ! Sh, sh, sh! It worked, it worked! He never saw me. boy am I lucky I didn't see him neither, But I can just imagine what a lox that one was. I got it right her Shirley was playing tricks No, no, that's wrong, you got it wrong Wait, wait, what that's not right? No, he was gorgeous he looked like Rudolph Rudolph who? Rudolph Valentino Get away Yeah, the sheik from Arabia Not the phantom from the opera? Uh, uh The sheik from where? The sheik from Arabia Get away That's right Wait a minute is this person kidding me around here? No, no absolutely Get away Well that's what happened I let him get away What do I'll do now maybe become a nun (that's impossible) I'm calling Shirley maybe she'll bring a gun Please Shirley, even if he's lon chaney fat, bald or short or tall Having a blind date is better than having No date, at no time with no one at all. Wait a minute maybe I spoke too soon Shirley get me out of here! Oh this one is cute.

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Blind Date

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