Song parody of

Good Thing He Can't Read My Mind

by Christine Lavin

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  • English (English)
  • Français (French)
  • Español (Spanish)

I am at the opera I don't like the opera But he loves the opera And I love him I follow the libretto I follow the conductor When I follow the plot My head begins to spin I don't understand a word Even when it's English Everyone around me says This is divine I don't like the opera but look I'm at the opera It's a good thing He can't read my mind. (Yes, he's a wonderful Parsifal and she's the best Tundra I've ever seen) Look at me I'm skiing When I do not like skiing But he loves skiing And I love him I rent the boots and poles I shiver in the cold I'm charging down the mountain Risking life and limb There's no exhilaration I am only feeling terrified Everyone around me's having Such a great time I do not like skiing But look at me I'm skiing It's a good thing He can't read my mind. (Yes, exhilarating is just the very word I was thinking of... scared of heights? Oh no, not me) I am not complaining I'm just making observations Expanding your horizons Is a sign of maturation Now I tolerate cigars 'Cause he's a smoker I'm playing chess Though I confess Sometimes I long for poker. I am eating sushi When I do not like sushi But he loves sushi And I love him I'm poking with a chopstick At a living breathing fish stick Oh my God! I think it's trying to swim Some say eating sushi Is like chewing on your own cheek Or sucking down a bucketful Of tentacled slime I do not like sushi But look I'm eating sushi It's a good thing He can't read my mind. (Yes, this is a very interesting texture What is it? Ohhhhh....) So if you see me in the sushi bar See me in the mezzanine See me on a ski slope Looking scared Hey don't feel sorry for me I must be in love Why in the hell else Would I be there? Before I met him life was dull I never took any chances Now I leap at every opportunity I find I do not like sushi I do not like skiing or the opera Maybe I will in time Maybe I will in time (Seconds? Sure I'd love some Mmmmmmm, yum!)

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"They say all's well that ends well, but _____________"
A it didn't end well.
B I'm in a new hell.
C I can't really tell.
D I'm in a new cell.

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