Song parody of
Tell Me on a Sunday
by Orlando Pops Orchestra
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ANDRE:
Your public needs you!
FIRMIN:
We need you, too!
CARLOTTA:
(unassuaged) Would you not
rather have your
precious little
ingenue?
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Signora, no!
the world wants you!
(The MANAGERS adopt their most persuasive attitudes)
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Prima donna
first lady of the stage!
Your devotees
are on their knees
to implore you !
ANDRE:
Can you bow out
when they're shouting
your name?
FIRMIN:
Think of how they all
adore you!
BOTH:
Prima donna,
enchant us once again!
ANDRE:
Think of your muse . . .
FIRMIN:
And of the queues
round the theatre!
BOTH:
Can you deny us the triumph
in store?
Sing, prima donna, once more!
(CARLOTTA registers her acceptance as the MANAGERS continue to cajole and the OTHERS reflect variously on the situation)
RAOUL:
Christine spoke of an angel . . .
CARLOTTA:
(to herself, in triumph)
Prima donna
your song shall live again!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(to CARLOTTA)
Think of your public!
CARLOTTA:
You took a snub
but there's a public
who needs you!
GIRY:
(referring to CHRISTINE)
She has heard the voice
of the angel of music . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(to CARLOTTA)
Those who hear your voice
liken you to an angel!
CARLOTTA:
Think of their cry
of undying
support !
RAOUL:
Is this her angel of music . . .?
ANDRE:
(to FIRMlN)
We get our opera . . .
FIRMIN:
(to ANDRE)
She gets her limelight!
CARLOTTA:
Follow where the limelight
leads you!
MEG:
Is this ghost
an angel or a madman . . .?
RAOUL:
Angel or madman . . .?
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(aside) Leading ladies are a trial!
GIRY:
Heaven help you,
those who doubt . . .
CARLOTTA:
You'll sing again,
and to unending
ovation!
RAOUL:
Orders! Warnings!
Lunatic demands!
GIRY:
This miscasting
will invite damnation . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Tears . . . oaths . . .
Iunatic demands
are regular occurrences!
MEG:
Bliss or damnation?
Which has claimed her . . .?
CARLOTTA:
Think how you'll shine
in that final encore!
Sing, prima donna,
once more!
GIRY:
Oh fools, to have flouted his warnings!
RAOUL:
Surely, for her sake . . .
MEG:
Surely he'll strike back . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Surely there'll be further scenes -
worse than this!
GIRY:
Think, before
these demands are rejected!
RAOUL:
. . .I must see
these demands are rejected!
MEG:
. . . if his threats
and demands are rejected!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Who'd believe a diva
happy to relieve a chorus girl,
who's gone and slept with the patron?
Raoul and the soubrette,
entwined in love's duet!
Although he may demur,
he must have been with her!
MEG/RAOUL:
Christine must be protected!
CARLOTTA:
0, fortunata!
Non ancor
abbandonata!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
You'd never get away
with all this in a play,
but if it's loudly sung
and in a foreign tongue
it's just the sort of story
audiences adore,
in fact a perfect opera!
RAOUL:
His game is over!
GIRY:
This is a game
you cannot hope to win!
RAOUL:
And in Box Five
a new game will begin . . .
GIRY:
For, if his curse is on this opera . . .
MEG:
But if his curse is on this opera . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Prima donna
the world is at your feet!
A nation waits,
and how it hates
to be cheated!
CARLOTTA:
The stress that falls upon a
famous prima donna!
Terrible diseases,
coughs and colds and sneezes!
Still, the dryest throat
will reach the highest note,
in search of perfect
opera!
MEG/GIRY:
. . . then I fear the outcome . . .
RAOUL:
Christine plays the Pageboy,
Carlotta plays the Countess . . .
GIRY:
. . . should you dare to . .
MEG:
. . . when you once again . . .
ALL:
Light up the stage
with that age old
rapport!
Sing, prima donna,
once more!
PHANTOM'S VOICE:
So, it is to be war between us! If these demands are not
met, a disaster beyond your imagination will occur!
ALL:
Once more!
(Taken directly from script)
ANDRE:
Your public needs you!
FIRMIN:
We need you, too!
CARLOTTA:
(unassuaged) Would you not
rather have your
precious little
ingenue?
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Signora, no!
the world wants you!
(The MANAGERS adopt their most persuasive attitudes)
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Prima donna
first lady of the stage!
Your devotees
are on their knees
to implore you !
ANDRE:
Can you bow out
when they're shouting
your name?
FIRMIN:
Think of how they all
adore you!
BOTH:
Prima donna,
enchant us once again!
ANDRE:
Think of your muse . . .
FIRMIN:
And of the queues
round the theatre!
BOTH:
Can you deny us the triumph
in store?
Sing, prima donna, once more!
(CARLOTTA registers her acceptance as the MANAGERS continue to cajole and the OTHERS reflect variously on the situation)
RAOUL:
Christine spoke of an angel . . .
CARLOTTA:
(to herself, in triumph)
Prima donna
your song shall live again!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(to CARLOTTA)
Think of your public!
CARLOTTA:
You took a snub
but there's a public
who needs you!
GIRY:
(referring to CHRISTINE)
She has heard the voice
of the angel of music . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(to CARLOTTA)
Those who hear your voice
liken you to an angel!
CARLOTTA:
Think of their cry
of undying
support !
RAOUL:
Is this her angel of music . . .?
ANDRE:
(to FIRMlN)
We get our opera . . .
FIRMIN:
(to ANDRE)
She gets her limelight!
CARLOTTA:
Follow where the limelight
leads you!
MEG:
Is this ghost
an angel or a madman . . .?
RAOUL:
Angel or madman . . .?
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
(aside) Leading ladies are a trial!
GIRY:
Heaven help you,
those who doubt . . .
CARLOTTA:
You'll sing again,
and to unending
ovation!
RAOUL:
Orders! Warnings!
Lunatic demands!
GIRY:
This miscasting
will invite damnation . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Tears . . . oaths . . .
Iunatic demands
are regular occurrences!
MEG:
Bliss or damnation?
Which has claimed her . . .?
CARLOTTA:
Think how you'll shine
in that final encore!
Sing, prima donna,
once more!
GIRY:
Oh fools, to have flouted his warnings!
RAOUL:
Surely, for her sake . . .
MEG:
Surely he'll strike back . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Surely there'll be further scenes -
worse than this!
GIRY:
Think, before
these demands are rejected!
RAOUL:
. . .I must see
these demands are rejected!
MEG:
. . . if his threats
and demands are rejected!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Who'd believe a diva
happy to relieve a chorus girl,
who's gone and slept with the patron?
Raoul and the soubrette,
entwined in love's duet!
Although he may demur,
he must have been with her!
MEG/RAOUL:
Christine must be protected!
CARLOTTA:
0, fortunata!
Non ancor
abbandonata!
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
You'd never get away
with all this in a play,
but if it's loudly sung
and in a foreign tongue
it's just the sort of story
audiences adore,
in fact a perfect opera!
RAOUL:
His game is over!
GIRY:
This is a game
you cannot hope to win!
RAOUL:
And in Box Five
a new game will begin . . .
GIRY:
For, if his curse is on this opera . . .
MEG:
But if his curse is on this opera . . .
ANDRE/FIRMIN:
Prima donna
the world is at your feet!
A nation waits,
and how it hates
to be cheated!
CARLOTTA:
The stress that falls upon a
famous prima donna!
Terrible diseases,
coughs and colds and sneezes!
Still, the dryest throat
will reach the highest note,
in search of perfect
opera!
MEG/GIRY:
. . . then I fear the outcome . . .
RAOUL:
Christine plays the Pageboy,
Carlotta plays the Countess . . .
GIRY:
. . . should you dare to . .
MEG:
. . . when you once again . . .
ALL:
Light up the stage
with that age old
rapport!
Sing, prima donna,
once more!
PHANTOM'S VOICE:
So, it is to be war between us! If these demands are not
met, a disaster beyond your imagination will occur!
ALL:
Once more!
(Taken directly from script)
