Manic

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Agora

The agora (; Ancient Greek: ἀγορά agorá) was a central public space in ancient Greek city-states. It is the best representation of a city-state's response to accommodate the social and political order of the polis. The literal meaning of the word "agora" is "gathering place" or "assembly". The agora was the center of the athletic, artistic, business, social, spiritual and political life in the city. The Ancient Agora of Athens is the best-known example. more »

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Everytime I go higher I hope
It's all gonna hold
Never have to feel manic lows
Never have to go
In a panic mode
No more holding on
To all the lies I'm told
In a manic mode

My mind erupting
In panic mode
Trachea crushing
About to choke
In need of something
Open my throat
But I would rather
Painfully go
Than live with nothing
Fear death is slow
My feathers ruffled
Plucked one by one
Future is muddled
Entropy flows
The blood is rushing
The manic lows

Always come remind what I been through
Everything I lost everything I walked into
Trauma
Always watching other kids living peaceful
Plotting how to be a part of it
Kinda obvious
Talked of homicide
Thought was dominant
Never tossed aside
All I wanted was revenge to calm my mind
Then it's gone from me
Covid altered that
Suicidal rage after pride 'cause she died
But it's not my fault
Didn't get to see her life leave her eyes
See her fold
Nah I never got a glimpse of closure
Now no hope that'll ever happen
Darkest overture to peace
Know my brain flippant and unique
Always unpredictable to me
Even with a lifetime of therapy
My resolve's fractured not one piece

Everytime I go higher I hope
It's all gonna hold
Never have to feel manic lows
Never have to go
In a panic mode
No more holding on
To all the lies I'm told
In a manic mode

And I mean nothing
Intangible
The blood is rushing
My hands are soiled
The skin is rubble
Chunks on the floor
Butter knife rubbing
The manic lows
Resolve is faulty
Poked full of holes
My hope is falling
With blood that pours
My arm's a violin my knife's the bow
It's hard to comprehend the manic lows

It's ok not to be ok, until I'm not
Matt, why you depressed, bitch I'm broke and can't get a job
On top of it college is mailing
About the cost I owe
Seven grand and not even
A single class I bought
On top of that I can't prove
That I'm even me I can't prove
That I'm nineteen or of age
Zero ID and no birth certificate
Been seeking one
Since 2020 but I can't
Obtain it 'cause I need to show
Some form of ID I know
Too bad mama abandoned
Me and papa raped somebody
Cause all I need is piece of
Family to go get it for me
But since I never had a
Family no one cared to want me
I can't move forward in my
Life future's akin to nothing
I can't afford a meal to
Eat I can't afford a bed to
Sleep I can't afford bare necessities
Nah I can't afford no
Therapy I can't afford to
Be not okay I can't afford
To kill myself I'll go bankrupt
If I fail I can't afford
To keep trying to get a
Birth certificate I can't afford
The momentus amount of
Fees to just apply I can't afford
To live this way on the brink
Of living and dying but I
Never had a choice in the matter
My life ain't mine and I
Know this shit but the
Manic lows just
Focus it closer
No hiding
And I rely on my
Antidote so
Notice my hope
Has been dying off

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