The Renunciate

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The Renunciate

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OCD
Purifies me
And gives me skill
Of which you could not conceive
So I record everything
Just counting my sins
Crafting a science of being
Learn more in a week than you do in aeons
And I'm deceived by the dogmas I've imbibed
Anxiety shrouds my mind
Just when I've put out a fire
Guess what another pyre
I spin my wheels
Performing rituals
And if I fail myself
I'll whip the lash to re-establish hell
But there is one escape
Pharmaceutical drugs to take
They might make you better for days
But trap you in a spiritual complacence
And I'm deceived by the dogmas I've imbibed
Anxiety shrouds my mind
Just when I've put out a fire
I burn my soul to light the other pyres
Don't know how long that I can stand this pace
When there's nothing left to emaciate
Where do you think that all this comes from?
Only a tyrant gets these results
F*ck f*ck f*ck I'm gonna die
If I don't heal my wasted mind
Learn Mahayana Buddhist meditation
And build a castle out of concentration
For you just do not exist
Anatta self relentlessness
And so the carnage begins
As the Bhikkhu must focus on deliverance
Now that the weeds are gone
You find wisdom from so far beyond
The Way does not allow selfishness
Or into dogmatism you will regress
The mind seeks out disaster
I know what you want most
To be free from the cycle of rituals
You suffer on the bumpy road
You are not so lost that you can't re-enter the river stream
Point after point you gain insight
That you can use to stop time
When you finally feel that you're free
That you hold the power of eternity
Life is beautiful complete and whole
I feel the echoes of the world soul
Not too late to make a break
And learn of the Truth from an Arhat Lord
What you think you know is out of your control
But I don't want to patronize
I just want to be fully alive

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