The Spiral

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Inhale Existence

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Fall
I'm here again, been here before
I always say this is the last time
Yet I'm spiraling downward, brain caving in
I'll drown from the weight of the mistakes I make each day
Repetition
Suffering now at the hands of my past self
Leading to collapse

So I spiral down

Last night I watched myself suffer the spiral again and again and again and
Last night I sank deeper into the abyss than I ever have before

On days like this the sun doesn't save me
Morning light exposes the depths of the shade
Day and night replaced by my brain splitting
Split at the seams of the skull
Ricocheting
Oh I would do anything for once to peacefully sleep through the night
I'm searching for a way
I swear I'd do anything to still the tempest, the inner turmoil

Be still
Please let me be still
The tempest, the inner turmoil
My soul is ricocheting inside of my damn skull

Please let me be
I have faith that the moon will continue to shine all night
Let me drift off
I wish for nothing more than to break the pattern
The markings of unsleep are etched into my eyes
Written in by myself

The blank page stares down
I find myself scared of not knowing if even this love is enough to ensure I survive
I'll waste myself to death before I admit that I have nothing left to say
Or nothing left in me
At least when the page is blank
Failure's but a dream

I'm afraid I would waste my whole life away before
Admitting I had more to give but for the spiral
That spins inside the absence of love
But I damn sure will not die in spite of denial
Apathy born inside the spiral
Day in, day out
We waste

Hold on to what keeps stillness inside you

I am a man on borrowed time
But I burn the blank pages as though they are mine
I hide, I run
A futile attempt to escape the things that haunt me
That cause me to fall

So I spiral down

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