Good Man

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STIL

SCL-interrupting locus protein is a protein that in humans is encoded by the STIL gene. STIL is present in many different cell types and is essential for centriole biogenesis. This gene encodes a cytoplasmic protein implicated in regulation of the mitotic spindle checkpoint, a regulatory pathway that monitors chromosome segregation during cell division to ensure the proper distribution of chromosomes to daughter cells. The protein is phosphorylated in mitosis and in response to activation of the spindle checkpoint, and disappears when cells transition to G1 phase. It interacts with a mitotic regulator, and its expression is required to efficiently activate the spindle checkpoint. It is proposed to regulate Cdc2 kinase activity during spindle checkpoint arrest… more »

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Am I a good man? Hmmm
Am I a good man?
He asked me directly, unblinking
Brazenly locking eyes with me
A man, just like me
Plagued with the same predilections, challenges & ungodly impurity
I could see
He needed authentic honesty
And for this, he chose to seek me
S.T.I.L., he asked "are you a good man?

The query struck me differently than it ever had
It spoke to my core, my spirit

I assessed for just a millisecond, 'cause that's all it took
For me to take a permeating look
At the man I've been & the man standing before him
I evaluated my every good deed while counting my plethora of sins
Meeting his gaze
I stood unphased. No

It wasn't the popular answer
And consequently, not the one he expected
But I could see he felt refreshed by my candor
Society says we're all good
I'm supposed to look at my good deeds, my good job
My good woman, her children, my kids
And my good intentions
I'm supposed to recognize that I've never committed murder
Or been jailed for a serious crime
I'm to place a checkmark next to every time
I've given to the homeless
Chose truth over a lie
Worked overtime to provide
And remembered anniversaries
Served breakfast in bed
Etcetera, Etcetera
And come to the conclusion that doing good
Means I'm inherently good

There's a problem with that line of thinking
Because this guy who writes romantic poetry
Takes the trash out, makes date night a priority
Compliments my girl's natural beauty
Begs for God to work through me
And leads Bible study
Is the same guy who's lied
Been lazy
Had messed up priorities
Taken shortcuts, given less than one hundred
Lost his temper and let it run free like thunder
Pounded his fist into his fellow man
Broken bones in the name of his own brand of justice and
Worn vengeance like skin
I was most comfortable in

Regrets, my past is littered by them
Like debris left after the storm of bad choices

So, no, I am not a good man

But, since my girlfriend, parents & children may all be listening
I must make this clear
Though I'm not perfect
I'm working on getting there
Palms 119:11 I consciously & constantly put to use
So that when the choice to sin approaches
I approach it boldly
Wrap it up in chains of The Word
And walk away
Psalms 1 is a continual reminder
That choosing His direction
Can serve as an outward reflection
Of what happens when a man chooses Biblical integrity
And as I live out Psalms 1 then Psalms 23 can be a reality
When stress and fear attempt to invade
I lean on His presence and my courage is stayed
Held in place
By His grace
The good I do, that folks want to give me credit for
Is an outpouring of His nature as it overrides my own

Lemme say that again for those who may have fallen asleep

The good that I do
Is because of the Good that's in me
And the Good that is in me is...Him

It is He who's taught me
To look respectfully
At the woman He sent me
It's He who's highlighted
The beauty in her mistakes
Grace within her failures and
The awesomeness of her efforts
He shows me her potential
Reminds me of her dreams
I hear the voice of The Creator saying to me
"Hey, this is my daughter
Treat her well
Because if you don't
Not only will I see
But there will come a night when she speaks to me
Presenting shattered pieces
Of what used to be her heart
And, young man, I will know
Your handiwork
And as any human father would
I will pursue you
With all that is in Me
As if you were My enemy

With this infinite warning in mind, I take steps
To step wisely as He leads
Perfect I am not but I am aiming to be
So I ask for your patience
And yes, that's asking a lot
I may not be the cream but
I'll eventually rise to the top
My character is flawed
My speech isn't always on point
I may forget to replace the trash bag
Every now and again....and again....and again

No, I am nowhere near perfect
That won't happen till Eternity
However, until then
Please know that a
Consistent, loving, caring, thoughtful
Hard-working, relentlessly protective and
Godly man
Is what I am trying to be

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