Back On My Feet

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Trading Twilight

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I know I'm not
The only one who's
Feeling lonely
The only one
Out here struggling
Feeling like a ghost at work
Feeling like I'm falling behind

Learning how to get back up after falling down
Learning how to put the pieces back when I fall apart
Still feeling like a ghost in public when I go out
But learning to be okay with that

Racing to work today, woke up late
The Wonder Years playing on my drive there
Trying to absorb the best of their ambition
Mold myself into a better person

My parents left soon after I graduated
I decided to stay
Couldn't let go of the only two that made me feel
Like life was worth it

Now plenty of times
I don't know what I'm doing
Take a step forward
While everyone is moving
Twenty steps ahead of me
And I don't know how to fix this

Learning how to get back up after falling down
Learning how to put the pieces back when I fall apart
Still feeling like a ghost in public when I go out
But learning to be okay with that

Driving home in the fading light of sunset
My work's on the other side of town now
So I don't have to drive past your house anymore
See scenes of us in the yard together

I remember being a kid
Carving pumpkins on your back porch
The glowing rocks that lined your driveway
And the lantern that we broke

Now plenty of times
I don't know what I'm doing
Take a step forward
While everyone is moving
Twenty steps ahead of me
But I know I'm not

The only one who's
Feeling lonely
The only one
Out here struggling
Feeling like a ghost at work
Feeling like I'm falling behind

Learning how to get back up after falling down
Learning how to put the pieces back when I fall apart
Still feeling like a ghost in public when I go out
But learning to be okay with that

I wonder what my mom would think if she were here
Was never really one to judge
But seeing me starting back at square one
I'm not going to die a failure
Sick of being a fucking coward
Sick of letting those who believe in me down

(But I know I'm not)
Learning how to get back up after falling down
(The only one who's feeling lonely)
Learning how to put the pieces back when I fall apart
(The only one out here struggling)
Still feeling like a ghost in public when I go out
(Feeling like a ghost at work)
But learning to be okay with that
(Feeling like I'm falling behind)

Even if it's not what I want
Even if it's not what I want

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