Closure

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Ocean Von Lapis

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Ocean
You know there is two parts to healing
First forgiving yourself
And then asking for forgiveness of those that you hurt
I apologize for the pain
Breaking your heart wasn't part of the plan
Though the fact remains that each fracture sustained
Was caused by an adolescent mind and a developed body intertwined
A man that didn't understand
As I was armed with a desolate heart as my ignorance
And unhealed past traumas as my crutch not to fall
With blind brokenness I viewed trust as pity for the forgiven
Opposed to a binding mechanism between you and I
So I apologize I succeeded in letting us fail
Maybe if I had monogamous eyes
Temptations then would have been ostracized
As you gave me your heart faithfully to monopolize
Yet without receiving fair trade
Instead I cauterized the bridge between our endless tomorrows and today
Which would have brought me favor in Gods eyes
So you are confirmation that forever is attainable
And that forever can be lost
If you do not first find yourself before committing to being timeless
With someone worth making time stop for
So I apologize for the pain
Caused by my growth occurring much later than the height of our passion
My growth occurring much later than our disconnection
My growth occurring much later than the realization of the love you imagined we would mirror
And the toxic reality in my reflection
Was not part of the operation to play with your heart
Yet not shocking if my wrong touch is the reason I lose you
I choose to apologize for the pain
Like how could I have expected you to submit to me
If I had not submitted to the most high
Instead I looked at your defiant attitude as daddy issues
Opposed to a lack of faith in my leadership
Because I was not following my father's instruction
I could not put it together then
But I can now so I apologize for the pain
And hope that your poor experiences with me
Does not dictate how you value the next man
Or hide your virtues from exposure
So if you haven't fully healed I hope me opening up to you
Provides you with the final steps needed for your closure
Closure

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer