4am

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godblessblurry

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Four a.m. feels the same as it did at the age of eight
I'm ashamed to admit that I feel nervous when I wake
I can't wait till it quits
This is such a fucking waste
What a day to forget
Want a place where I can live without thinking of if I wanna drive into a wall or fly off a cliff
I'm just talking shit

Cause I know my demons are leaving me it's me
There ain't no defeating this defeatist instinct
There's something missing inside, I know
Wished for a hole in the head, but instead I feel it in my soul.

I need to grow old so I can shrink and refuse to be told what I should think
Just sing songs to sing songs, not to prove something
What a life it'd be

I need to grow up
All I really know is I don't know as much as I thought I had
Somewhere along I fell off my path

So I'm trying to find my way back
But it seems the rain has erased my tracks
And all I have now is an ear to ground
Just praying that I might hear the sound of some sweet voice with some way out
And if there any doubt I'll just lay here and drown

Cause I know my demons are leaving me it's me
There ain't no defeating this defeatist instinct
There's something missing inside, I know
Received a bust in the jaw as an answer to a pray
Now I taste blood on my mouth
I ran around the town to see if anyone missed me
But they were still better off without

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