I Get To Play Me

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Jonny Johnson

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The couple at the table speak softly and smile 'bout world secret to them
The two on the bench scheme 'bout new church to worship Him
The walls shimmer, free of worry, in this room of good fortune
And I, another day, with feet to pass through its doors
From certainty, to darkness, I am armed with words
To paint understanding, then peace strikes suddenly
and my restlessness is stirred
For a moment, home comes to claim me
An ordered mind, but it's the same me
I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
Cross fields of fury, flags flown celebrate games of vict'ry and death
Winners stand tall and losers, they all, pay their respects
The distance they traveled gets measured after they gave it their best
And I, another day, am pressed to draw my sword
Trouble at my doorstep I cannot ignore
Cries of mourning, cries of vict'ry, cry together for a chord
I defend when they try to game me
I speak so they won't chain me
I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
Purity and perfection, a performance preached by loved ones as the cure
Spoken loudest by its most devoutest but even she is not always so pure
This body she's affected, offended, and she carries on so self-assured
And I, another day, certainly awake
Reality shining brightly puttin' tears on my face
Distant in the night, both of us is right
Can the view grow mature
I hope it comes to contain me
Let it find and detain me
I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
She don't look like a Lindsey, her face is more Jill
I didn't get to name her, but if I get a chance I will
Somethin' more suited to her actions and her skill
And, I another day, outside what they called her
Look 'pon those brain-tied by the laws of grammar
They give it matter, I shoot rainbows, and yet still
Call me what you want, but it's plain me
In your mind's eye you can restrain me
But, I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
I watch you find a language to articulate that inner self
Your words mask your identity, you see you could be anything else
You create an abstraction and question if it's your authentic self
And I another day, respond to your pressures
Don't go falling into thought traps of being impure
Once it is said, it carries its own voice separate from yours
I'm calling your bluffs to save me
Even when masked it's an okay me
But, I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
For sure he was a black man, you know how I could tell
I stuck my hand in his, and mine was white as hell
I said, Ya lookin' good, Sir, he said, I'm Shontelle
And I another day, saw somethin' I'd seen not
But differences aside, there was one thing I sought
I said, I am happy to see you, you are all I've got
I dress up for you so that maybe
One day when I'm screwed you'll save me
But, I am reminded, once in a while
I get to play me
Survival keeps me dressing up in all kinds of colors and cloaks
Listen to my language, don't go snooping 'round or tryin' to get too close
The veil is thin and faced with truth you must trust your sense to know
And I another day, could have time to prepare
Or I must rise to the side of the victim that's there
When the axe has fell, time will tell
and speak to how I fared
But when they take a stand to try to sway me
They create a plan to try to slay me
They best bring their A game
Because you best bet I am going to
play me

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