Making a Man
Operation Mincemeat
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A mind that is stronger than iron That shines a light in the dark And a body that could wrestle a lion Then deal out a witty remark He has so very many astounding attributes He's noble and courageous He looks excellent in suits Seamless blend of dreaminess Experience And genius These are the ingredients you need When you're making a man Making a hero quick as we can The nation's in need of a marvellous man A dependable dreamboat A shining example of what humans can be So we're making a man Step one Thinking caps on Gotta pull a fast one, Fast on the hun. Gotta find a corpse A dead man? Of course! Can we gather a cadaver from the local morgue? Charles, this is a secret mission We can't go raising any suspicion Luckily I know the perfect man, To help us hatch this plan! Welcome to London! We're cockneys! And this is what cockneys wear! Bodies watcha know 'bout bodies? Nothing at all Well if you need information about expiration there's only one man that you shoulc call He knows the ropes He knows the knives! He knows all the ways of ending lives! It's Spilsbury! Spilsbury! Introducing Bernard Spilsbury So you say you want the perfect body? Spilsbury I've got every kind that you could need Sir Bernard Spilsbury Old ladies to adolescents in all stages of putrescence So come inside and see what you can see! So don't delay or they'll decay Come on fellas, step this way! Feast your eyes on all my lovely bodies Spilsbury Take a look, I've quite the repertoire Sir Bernard Spilsbury From Grandads to old biddies, Young men to little kiddies! You want homicide or suicide, or can't decide Well come inside and see "Why is she so small?" "Monty, make it stop" Mister Roberts choked on a yoghurt Mister Beezles mauled by weasels If you're after buckets of gore Here's Brian, he's basically a lung in a drawer No! Bernard we need a chap who's fresh, of military age, with undamaged flesh So if the Spanish do their autopsy they'll certify him Drowned at sea! Have no fear I'll find your perfect body Spilsbury I get skip loads of these stiffs each and ev'ry day Sir Bernard Spilsbury I'll find your dear departed that we need to get things started Or my name isn't Bernard Spilsbury OBE I'll find your man Step two Leave a trail of clues Pack a wallet with receipts so we can prove that our Bill had a life A man about town Who splashed his cash then drowned And they will find that the dined at the Hottest joins with the coolest cats The swinging spots with the hotsy tots Oh the nightlife's such a thrill! And they will see our boy, He has such a taste for finery He's dressed to impress Wouldn't settle for less Thirty four round the chest! Only the best for Bill Step three send Bill to sea Get him all the way to Spain in secrecy So he can wash ashore And then win us the war Charles my genius, take the floor "Admirals! May I present my idea for the world's first human thermos" Our Bill will sail by submarine in a giant thermos, a corpse canteen Vacuum packed and air tight through and through Chop chop! We've got a lot to do! Suck out the oxygen so Bill won't rot What? Add dry ice so he won't get hot When he's on his quest it's only the best for Bill! What's it made of? Stainless steel Won't it smell? That's why it's sealed What about the crew? Won't they know there's a corpse aboard? "Bloody good question" "Good point" "I forgot what I said" We could say that it's equipment It's a top secret shipment It's need to know Jean that's brilliant I'm quite impressed Only the best for Bill "You're a good girl-" "Monty, that file is confidential. If we've lost it we could get in" "Serious trouble" Charlie don't be so narrow minded "I don't think it's narrow minded" Stop fretting about guidelines and rules "This is important Monty" Remember we're his Majesty's finest "Well I don't see what that's got to do with" And regulations are for cowards and fools But Monty we're responsible for how this thing is done! If we claim the final victory who cares just how we won? For when you write the book My boy we're off the hook So just be a man 'Cause we're making a hero Quick as we can The nation's in need Of a marvellous man A dependable dreamboat A shining example of what humans can be Making a man "This is the most secure building in England alright" "Horrible wet hands." "This is the most secure building in England" "There's no way he can find us here" Lads look here I've found your perfect body Spilsbury Look what fate has landed in our lap! Sir Bernard Spilsbury This homeless chap in Croydon accidentally ate rat poison The perfect worm to bait our little trap! "He's perfect" So he didn't drown Don't worry about it! Won't they suspect? Ha! I doubt it Foreigners aren't great coroners, see? And no one in Spain is as clever as me I've found your man I've saved the day So fetch my fee And I'll be on my way "Really makes you wonder about the security of the building" "We don't have a projector in this office" "It's called the magic of theatre, Charles" "He must have a family. We need to find out don't we." "Why?" "They could provide us information, his medical records" "Spilsbury's given use everything we need to know." "You must at least know his name. Who was he?" "Don't you care?" "I care about the mission. I care about saving a lot more lives than one tram." "Monty!" "The things I do for this country" "You are out of control!" "Johnny, we need the receipts for Bill's wallet" Do you really think you're working independently Or that your little team's the only thing that's under me? The notion that you're more than a drop in the ocean Of the hundred plans I have in motion is enough to earn demotion Montagu this war is bigger than you Stop acting like I don't know what to do You're making a mockery of this whole damn operation You're making a mess of every decision that you're making You're making a spectacle Well you're making it difficult to be sensible You're making it about you because you're bloody egotistical Oh my god! "Johnny, let me explain. Picture the scene." A bachelor residing in Oval Here's his lease agreement Soon to make his way up the aisle They'll tie the knot next summer To celebrate his recent betrothel A sparkling diamond ring They spent his leave in London in style One night on the town He took his girl to dinner and the latest West End show She said he looked so handsome in his suit from Saville Row One last night of celebration before he leaves to save the nation Delivering the plans for our Sardinian invasion With a never-ending paper trail A cover story that can't fail We made him up then made his life come true Believe in Bill and they'll believe in him too We've made you a man "He needs to be carrying a letter." "Soldiers don't go to war without a reminder of why they're fighting in the first place." "Quite right. I like it." And they'll see it there in writing That our Bill, he went down fighting for his love, his life and his democracy So we're making a man Making a hero quick as we can The nation's in need of a marvellous man A dependable dreamboat A shining example of what humans can be God that's brilliant Really brilliant God that's brilliant They'll never see it coming God that's brilliant Really brilliant God that's brilliant So daring and so cunning Seamless blend of dreaminess, experience and genius These are the ingredients you need, when you're making a man!
The easy, fast & fun way to learn how to sing: 30DaySinger.com
Written by: Felix Hagan, Natasha Hodgson, David Cumming, Zoe Roberts
Lyrics © Downtown Music Publishing
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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"Making a Man Lyrics." Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.lyrics.com/lyric-lf/11646919/Operation+Mincemeat/Making+a+Man>.
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