My Story

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J.Z.

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Tell me how you really feel
Its hard.. to put into words.. feelings you know
Well tell me the best you can
I mean, I don't even really know what I'm going through myself
But you can describe to me what you feel your going through right
I really don't like talking about things I don't understand or care about
You don't care about how you feel
I don't care about a lot of things
Why
Do you really care to know cause ill tell you
I mean... I wouldn't ask myself a question I don't care to know the answer to
Well
I don't want
Adoration
I don't want
Attention
I don't want
Admiration
I don't want
Celebration
I just want
Peace and time
Yeah
I just want
Peace of mind
I just want
Time to find
Where am I
How am I
What am I
Why am I
Even fighting
To live when I'm just surviving
Life like to strike like lightning
Don't want no love its blinding
Just wanna laugh and vibe yet
I feel like getting violent
When you hear me get quiet
I'm screaming in my silence
I sleep yet I'm still tired
Cant dream cause life's a nightmare
I wanna leave this mindset
But i cant cause I'm tied up to kindness
Not for myself but my friends
I wonder when this shit ends
Prolly when I'm not living
So i just wanna fucking make it go so I can stop stressing
But i guess that all of us aint getting what's a happy ending
Feel like I'm dumb for trying harder when this struggles endless
I don't even know what the f- I'm feeling regardless
So you really don't know what you feeling
I mean.. when people ask me i say idk
Well, if you don't know.. lets get to know
Ayt
Every night I cry
But no tears in sight
I got one person to call
That's my boy all night
DTB for life
There's no such thing as a spark
They call me toxic
But I'm heartless like tony stark
I don't need no love
I don't need no dove
I don't need no one feeling pity for me enough
I got all this shit I'm dealing with, I cant even fucking look
Cause one eye on my mentality
One eye on my look
Two eyes on the mirror
Thinking when is this guy gonna jump
Thinking why do people be hating
Its not like I do nothing good
I put my trust in you for good
Told you everything I loved
Now we aint even speaking
Like strangers to lovers but reverse
Music the only thing going that's keeping me from the dark
The only thing I love, took half of my heart
Being tired for keeping a smile
Tired for saying I'm fine
Cause people say they fine, but they really out of time
I don't give a f*ck, the shit that people do
But my minds going dark cause the shit I've been through
I just focus on myself, focus on not caring
Listen i tried to explain it, but that's the best that I can do
Thank you... maybe we can understand each other better now

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