If Only I Was Never Me

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Richard Zihan Peng

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 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer

It's coming any second now
All these memories I've been trying to hide
They're filling up my head again
And I should be asleep by now
Instead I'm lying on my bed in the silence
All the things I wish I never said
If I'd a nickel for each lie I told
Oh I would be a poor man
I'm not any good at hiding emotions
I'm not any good at playing pretend
Oh I could be in love by now
I could be starring as the lead in a movie
I could be anything that I ever wanted
If only I was never me
It's coming any second now
I can feel it when I step off the sidewalk
Something special is about to begin
And I'll be ruining it all by tomorrow
Like I've ruined everything in the past
I'm a tragedy that's waiting to happen
If I'd a nickel for each word I say
I'd be the king of California
I'm not any good at playing the long game
I'm not any good, not any good for ya
Oh I could be away by now
I could be traveling the skies and the seas
I could be anywhere that I ever wanted
If only I was never me
Oh I could be okay by now
I could be happy just to wake up and breathe
I could be living every day in the moment
If only I was never me
But I don't wanna be somebody else
I don't wanna give up on myself
If this is all I'll get then I'll get by
If I can't reach the sun, well f*ck I'll try
If I'd a nickel for each time I fold
Oh I'd be richer than a con man
I'm not any good at reading the future
I hardly know the back of my hand
Oh I could have been saved by now
I could be praying every night on my knees
I could be good enough to get into heaven
If only I was never me
Please don't run away just yet
There's a million things that I haven't seen
And I'm sorry that I couldn't do better
But I could use some company
If only I was never me
It's coming any second now
It's coming any second now
It's coming any second now

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer