I'll Never Go Back

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Ricky Lee & Sailin' Shoes

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I been here before
I know the drill
Get in, check out
And pay the bill
But this time was diff'rent
I knew it right away
That biggun' on wheels
Was comin' my way

She had bacon
On her breath
And all that candy
It's like her meth
Crumbs on her face
From eatin' pork rinds
She's got one thing
On her mind

She had it at full throttle
Eatin' her cookie dough
Her cart rammed my shin
Tires smashed my toes
That scooter hit me
Like a Big Mac attack
Now I've learned my lesson,
I'll never, I'll never go back

Now I really needed
That new wax toilet ring
But these Wal-Mart trips
Are a dangerous thing
Not sure what happened
'Cause I blacked out
Security's lookin' for that
Two ton chick with gout

My therapist says
I'll walk again
And if that's true
I'll never hesitate again
For a stuffed mumu

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