Dirt (feat. John Rushton)

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A lost soul. A nobody picking from the primrose
Petals fall so gracefully from out my bedroom window
Where the hell did I go wrong I'm always left guessing
Reminiscing on my past is like a death sentence
What's it like to fall in love when she just wanna f*ck
Yeah, I break my fucking fingers tryna answer when she call me up
Twenty eight wasted years I feel like I've lived long enough
Unresponsive on the floor
Baby, I have lost to drugs
Scared to lend some help when I cannot defend myself
Drag me to the depths, a soulless death, I am condemned to hell
LORD knows I deserve it
I ain't perfect just a reprobate
Hard to set the record straight
I feel like I have fell from grace
I feel defeated from these demons I've been fighting with
Twist the cap off a bottle and pop a Vicodin
I lie awake at night hoping that these problems might resolve
End times are coming I'm just tryna get right with God
I'm on the edge feet dangling
Paranoid psyche
When they carry my body tell 'em please be patient
If they exercise the demons from my head that these beats keep banging in
I may just need my faders adjusted
Because this heart is as cold as a bloody buck knife blade to the stomach
A broken contract with the devil
Couldn't escape from his clutches
Ever stare deep in your soul, but weren't able to touch it
I have silent reflection turned to violent obsessions
Can't even buy me a second
All these apparitions packing in and lined at the exit
This ain't no cry for attention
This is more of a warning
It's a sign it's a message
When I die, don't bother with a funeral
Ain't no celebration when the other side ain't beautiful
Let my flowers wilt at the edge of my grave
Ain't no cry for help whenever your seconds away
And don't bother with a viewing or a casket
Let my corpse rot on top a therapeutic mattress
A deep rest this is no one else's fault but my own
A nobody always destined to be lost and alone

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