Toxic Self-Reliance

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5th Child

3:34

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Everything I do I gotta do it by myself
For the longest time this is how I've felt
Wanna get away wanna hide myself
Who you gonna call with a cry for help
Feeling like everybody lean on me
Can't stop now got a dream on me
When the game on the line and my name on the line gotta figure something out I don't see no team
Always on call when they need me
Oh 5th gon do it off GP
I need I need I need I need I need like they got it on repeat
Clean up hitter I'm a neat freak
Gotta know it all like a cheat sheet
Gotta get gone need a retreat
Cause it's back to back to back, three peat
Hell yea, stay looking out for they welfare
But where can I turn for some child support
Married to the life til I file divorce
See me reach for the raft but they drown ya boy
And it ain't like I and never found the source
I ain't saying that, I'm just saying that
Sometimes y'all make me wanna fade to black
Just to keep the peace and my brain intact
Cause I've lent  a hand when they was in a jam
But when I gave em slack they ain't pay me back
Had to face the fact I'm the one to blame cause I been  way too nice
I'm ashamed of that, before you go sharing yo two sense
I know what you think, I told my shrink
I said they ain't got me like I got them
She said man that's crazy and poured a drink and said

It's Toxic, and I know it
When I'm boxed in I got moments
Where the voice in my head starts taking over can't lie it's hard to control it
But I'm focused on fixing things I seen around me that's broken
To the point I get broke down myself I need help this is me being open
Oh what I wouldn't do for a back rub, a relaxing soak in my bathtub
How can it be all these folks round me who I hustle for but I lack love
And I love where I live at, still wanna give back
Still gonna fight for it, still get our lick back
Feel like a fool when I turn on the news
Then walk around smiling like everything's cool
The water the streets the garbage the crime
I'm starting to think that it's all the design
I been here for decades I saw the decline
They fall for the prime and follow the blind
All of the time, look at these pains, look at these thangs, top of the line
My light is real, no stopping my shine
Fakers will crack at the drop of a dime
Later for that I got mountains to climb
Ducking the goofies we get to the bread
Guess I could tell you or prove it instead
Foot on they neck til they do what I said
Check on your strong friend
I know I'm complaining but end of the day I'm just thankful
First for my wife and my baby I'd kill for and
Two because baby I'm built for it that's why I

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