I & I (Me, Myself, and I)

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Matthew Bellinger

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I remember
c time in my life 
Where I didn't feel
Much of anything
Or like I was anything
So I just wanted to tell y'all a story 
When I felt like this 
If you know what that guitar feels like
Then you know

Come on, sing along
If you ever felt like you're nothing 
If you wanna feel like you're something
If you wanna break free
From the casing you're making 
Your hands have been aching
You have trouble waking 
You feel the earth shaking 
You try to escape
c Caterpillar trying to break the pillars
End up a killer or on the painkillers 
cnd I had just wanted to bloom like a lily 
The king of my city
Not cities I'm in, but the city I craft 
Get to the aft cause I'm under attack
I'm missing my life raft
God dammit 
This isn't how I die
This can't be how I die
So I float and I'm carried away
No, this is important
You gotta listen 
cnd through the adventure of losing my life 
Floating for days holding onto my knife 
I wondered if I should just use it and die
I wondered if life was worth giving a try 
To survive in the days, in the weeks
That I thought I had fought with myself 
I landed on islands so timid and quiet
cnd there I met a person
I thought my condition had worsened
Because I could not even make out a human
They spoke to me, and with a call to me
I was drawn to thee
They told me a version of human creation
One rife with orphans 
cnd hatred left dormant 
One with perversions 
cnd forced in submersions
Coercion extortion beat down to submission
c vision they gave me 
That cleared up my eyes
cnd I found there were three
I look in the water 
What's happening to me
I know that I'm there 
I'm not easy to see
I don't know myself 
My vision is fogged, I collapse
I wake up again with the same fucking issue 
But this time I know not to question
cnd realize 
That that reflection, was me

So if you've been feeling
Like you're nothing
Listen to me
Because your life is worth something
You feel like nothing 
But they understood 
Oh shit, I forgot to end my story
So my vision cleared
cnd I didn't fight it
cnd I heard a voice
cnd it called to me
So I followed it 
It was plain to see
That it was no one
Just me, myself, and I

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