CYCLE

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I started having to think back
On people I mismatched
But nevertheless
It's every mishap
That made me the man I am
I'd never give back
The smile they stole from me
I'm happy to live that
And nobody knows
Taking my soul to try to put on a show
To try to master the flow
To make it past all the people
That would stand in my road
I need to go
If I don't vent to you now I'mma jump for sure
Off that roof straight into the floor
Get back up and then go for more
Till my skin ain't got no pores
It's all fake people talking like they know the story
Smiles I show like it's hunky dory
Friends I know turn to jokes it's boring
That's why my dopamine is acting lowly
Let me tell you why the f*ck I'm recording
Twenty-three people on the list I'm mourning
Thought that they were with me but the rain is pouring
I don't see a future where their life's important
The people I love I lay upon a short list
Fisher, Micheal, and Bella that's all you're gonna get
I never try to embellish myself I'm full of shit
But that's a group that I promise I'll never fucking diss
And Mariah, I remember what the f*ck they did
Keep your head up homie I won't let 'em forget
I've been stuck in the freezer thinking bout others' sins
Like that bitch that drunk dialed and played pretend
Don't think I forgot that call you made
Nox and I still joke about it, it's all in vain
Moving on, I think I need me a coffee mate
Stimulation is the only way my heart won't break
It's still actually f*ck you all
I don't try to be your friend
Don't need to say I'm involved
I'd like shout some people out
Cause they ain't breaking my balls
But if I did then I'd regret it in a month when we fall
It's all fake people talking like they think they know me
Think materials and cashflow will control me
When all I ever do is prove you people below me
All I ever needed was a reason, so hold me
Close I'm coming out my house for once to prove that I'm the best
I've been rapping since a child now I say shit with my chest
It's impossible to fathom that I've made it all this far
But the truth of it is all I ever needed was the bars
Not the weed
Not the girls
Not the homies
Not the games
This the only motherfucking thing that keeps me sane
I get disrespected when your video get plays
It's fucking shame that you're reading at 2nd grade
Levels to this shit
I barely even need to try
I just let anger buried in me come alive
I think all my peers will die before they 25
That's not even a diss
It's just the path they fucking ride
Don't you come at me as if I'm fucking you over
World had out for me forever I'm colder
Consequence of being real is that I'm a soldier
And I'll unpack the trauma when I'm a little bit older
And that's the path that I chose
And that's the path that I chose
And then the cycle will grow
And then I'll end up alone

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