Deceiver

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Lance Broman

2:34

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Look, I don't know who I wanna be Changing Lifestyles every week
I got to break my back to get new music out And Then I only end up hitting 20 streams
I've been stressing myself out to make an album Once it makes it out, I feel content
At least for a second Till I start to question every Single setting

Will this ever cease I don't know, people tell me that I'm skilled
But I don't even want to contemplate that right now I've been caught up in my feels
I was messing with another girl I should've left Alone
And now I gotta deal with all the consequences Not to mention I'm a Christian dabbling around

With
Mm, ooh I know better, don't worry I'll get it all Figured out, I'll repent
The last minute, I'm clever
No way my time's gonna end 'fore I plan it to swear I'ma get it together, nah that was

A lie I like to tell myself those all the time
Deep down inside, know that's not gonna fly But I Wanna get the best of both worlds in
This life
Screw it, I don't care anymore, I deal with the strife

I don't agree with what people are doing I don't Wanna do it then do it sometimes
Know to most people that line don't make sense
Cause it doesn't make sense yet it does in my mind
Act like I don't know the price, I know I pay with my life

I know I'm not just affecting myself, but the people Around me
I told you I knew, can't find an outlet for all this Stress
And honestly, that's why I do what I do Knowing the Truth, hop in the booth
Pour out my heart for 300 views They listen in awe Can't believe it's you

I thought that Lance  was a regular dude, I guess he Alright
Beat up myself cause it's been 20 years And I'm still At a place that I don't wanna be
Scared of the day that when I have children that They'll see a version I don't want ''em to see
Tryna be a better person, but I got thorn in my side

And I don't wanna leave, blown and tossed up in the sea
James 1 through 5 is on repeat, Billy Graham been Taking up my feed
Papa Sam I'm followin' your lead I know I check on Grandma less than what she needs
Especially right now, she hitting 93, but she been Staying strong

And if I'm being honest, she probably healthier than me
But that's another problem, I've been being lazy
Losing sight of every single thing I used to be
I had to stop, recreate myself, pray and ask for help

Change my life before the clock, runs out
I've been pushing everything inside my life aside
I know that's not really something I should do
I've been playing both sides, now I gotta choose

It just hit me, just how much that I could lose
And I can't lose it, I been trynna shake it loose
But every single time I'm free
I fall the cycle just repeats

Caught up in my mind, devil said I'm weak
And that I live a lie, hope nobody sees
Cause honestly, he's right, I'm feeling like a cheater
Doing what I like, then claiming a beliver

I can't tell if I'm a Christian or just a professional deceiver

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