Swallow Me Up

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Ben Coleman

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Many years ago back in school
I tried my best to look so cool
But all that hard work was suddenly gone
When I accidentally called the teacher mom
I just said it and I don't know why
And it made it worse that he was a guy
Laughter was the only sound

I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up (Woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh oh)
I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up

Standing there in the elevator
With three people that I'd see later
Silence falls and bless my heart
I let out a almighty loud [parp]
It was deadly but not that silent
The smell inside was pretty violent
I say nothing eyes look down

I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up (Woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh oh)
I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up

(Bridge)
When I trip up in front of you
When I realise I'm in the ladies loo
When I ask a fat girl when's it due

Just swallow me up (Woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh oh)
I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up

At a funeral the other day
I saw the widow crying away
I touched her shoulder but being so old
It made her jump and she fell in the hole
But cos this woman was all of a dither
She grabbed my arm and pulled me down with her
Lying there while everyone frowned

It seemed the ground just went and swallowed me up
Swallow me up (woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh oh)
I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up

I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up (Woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh)
Swallow me up (woah oh oh)
I wish the ground would just come and swallow me up

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