Intimidation To Jump

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J. DAV

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So I'm just
Scrolling through Tumblr
Yanno
Just looking for a piece
That I haven't recorded
And I got here
To this page

I'm not sure why I haven't recorded it before
I remember writing it
Um
And enjoying it
Haven't read it in awhile
But
Really surprised I didn't record it
Because it was an inspiration piece
Um
Yeah
So
We're just gonna go at it real quick
Or maybe slow
Who knows
Where it will end up

Uh
Anyway

It's called
Intimidation to Jump
And it's inspired
By Ebony Stewart
And it goes
A little something
Like this

I am a steward
Looking after these words
A moment of silence
Comes fewer
Than a cure

I said
I don't think I have
The button flow
But then again
The originals matter
Until they don't
No mo

That's not to cast shade
At my fellow artists
I'm just suggesting
I'm different
But similar in mindset
Vulnerable and unguarded

Way back when
Gets a little longer
The more I say it
But I remember the first time
I came to face it
The demons of whispering
In between my ears
Constantly absurd
I learned to tame it
Because if I didn't
They would take it

And by it
I mean me
So I turned to these pages
Ha
It's kind of punny
Turning pages

Different chapters
Different ages
I was confined by my mind
Until I broke it free
From its cages
And that's multiple cages
Kind of like multiplication
There's a difference between
Not being good with math
And just hating it

I am radiant
I find that I am learning patience
But inside I am impulsive
Like a robber
At a bus station
Running away from the police
Hoping to find
A safe destination

I see slam poets
On the web
Posting their speech
And I am inspired
By each
And every one of them
I
May not be able
To recite so eloquently
But that's not the point
Presently

There's never been a better time
Than the one right now
Beginning the destiny
Confidently humble
Perhaps needing to be
A bit cocky
That though I do not fit
The structure and style
I am unique

But even in my uniqueness
It means
Nothing
Unless it reaches
Someone
And teaches them
Something
Or breaches
A curiosity
I hope I can be inspiring
To those who are tiring
From the beat down
Of this crazy society

Ever chasing we are
For personal propriety
I dare not lie to y'all
If I dare not lie to me
I repeat the lines
That I've written before
Just as a reminder to me
Because I must check myself
Before I lose sight of me

Self-awareness
The individual key
To unlocking the door
And opening opportunity
What once was
Can return to be
If you agree
To seek out the monstrosity

A back against the wall
A cut on the cheek
The age of three
Admittedly
I lose myself when I am writing
I'm talking to myself
As I am writing
I am writing and the words
They are now my breath
I am writing
Into the digital pad
I can't stop
Until sign says so
Like Rain Man

I may not be
Exactly
A rambler
Of button poetry
Or maybe I am
Or maybe it doesn't matter
Or maybe it does
That was the anxiety
Speaking
As I begin imagining
The first time I'd recite
This piece
And now I am sweating
Slightly chuckling
Brain numbing

I'm fumbling now
Being a human is ugly
And funny
Both in the ha ha sense
And in irony

I am ironing
Out the wrinkles
Constantly looking to evolve
Becoming smooth like silk
And like a rose in spring growing
It's late
And now I am foaming
At the mouth

I spout
And shout
And I let it all out
Once again showcasing
The commitment to this therapy
Of just
Writing everything down

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