The Reason Why

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Black Sanna

4:13

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Uh
Smoke two clips a day
Then I'm on my way
To stay stuck in my depression
Thats everlasting
Cuz my mom and pops rule with aggression
Giving me no food air is what im digesting
I want the to love my mom and pops, I want that connection
But they reject me with stone cold facial expressions
Leaving gaping lashes on my back at the age of seven
Asking did I ever lesson

The only thing I learned is that my pops likes to give me scars
Just so I can vent abt years later in a couple bars
And that leads to me with a gun to my head looking to the sky asking why god

Sometimes there will be days where I'm not the same
And I start writing a suicide note to follow my rope swing
Perhaps a smith and Wesson to my brain
That's a good solution to end the pain

Did I get a little to dark for you
This is apart of my view
Which is why I be feeling awfully blue
It might be hard to chew
That the guy who has a smile that stretches  miles isn't who you knew
But hey man,  that's the truth
That's why I go do drug abuse
Niggas will say that it's all an excuse
Than I assume that you knew my life isn't really going how I planned or really smooth

What I rapped about is just the surface
I got other  problems in the dark corners lurking
So I deal by smoking and jerking
You might find this to be TMI or just disturbing
But this my cry for help, that's currently emerging
Almost killed myself with the gun if the gun didn't jam I'm hurting

Self esteem at an all time low
Be getting my heart broken left and right by all of these hoes
So I hide the pain with countless dough
And vent with all of these flows
It's hard sorta hard you know?
Uh
But with za
It's how I deal it's how I cope
A couple of smokes and I'm ready to go
Deal with this cold dark lonley world cuz if  I don't go smoke I'll go take the iso
Two bottles down my own throat
Take a trip down to the underworld so now you know

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