Palms

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Sol Hardy

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When I was a kid
Most of the learning I did
Was watching my dad
Loving my mom
Coming home pissed
From hating his job
And clenching his fist
With prayers in his palms
That I never heard
Yeah
That I never heard

I never got to read what his lips would bleed into his fingers 
I never got to see what the meaning in his reasons was
But he gripped them tight into mine
And my sister's hands with love
All tough and calloused up 
That grip never told a lie
Now I'm just trying to read his wise
In my palm lines and it goes a little like

It's not about a long life
It's about a lot of living
It's about giving and being forgiven
Cause you're gonna f*ck up sometimes
You're gonna fall hard but you better keep trying
It's not about dollars and dimes or being right
Or even writing in rhyme 
It's about standing taller with time
Being sight for the blind
A light in the times that night seems to swallow the sun
Never fear being the only one for a cause
In the end it's just you and God
But here and now you make your home
You make your friends and you make your art
Better make it count
Better live it all cause your days are numbered 
And they're running out
Yeah, they're running out

And I grasp his lessons in my fingers
Counting my blessings and all of the reasons
For never second guessing and always believing
But I'm wondering if I'll ever believe him
Or if I'll just be him because it's the same
What we're bleeding
These questions are seething like
Is fate in my genes or she chained to my freedom
Is being worth all of the thinking
The price of the needing
The vices and grieving
What is the point
Where is your voice
In all of this noise I got gun shot thoughts
Like I'm just lost
I walk this rock and look for God
And I wish you were here to tell me 
Whether or not I'm doing it right
Or wasting my time, Dad

But I guess it goes on
And it goes on and it goes on
I put my face into my palms
Trying to taste a sinner's psalms
And in sweat in salt I feel your words
Yeah, I hear your voice

It's not about winning your fights
It's all of your might against the world
When it tries to take you alive
It's about needing help and knowing it
If you're bleeding out you're showing it
If you're believing now just go with it
Cause you're never gonna know unless you try
Everything that lives is gonna die
Everyone that loves you is gonna lie
Now you can despise and you can just cry about it
Or you can straighten your spine up and just write about it
You can spend your life chasing your pride
Or you can learn to listen and love like a child
Cracking a smile as moments slip by you
Never looking behind you 
Never losing your fire

Just keep paving your way
Trying to be a better man than you were yesterday
And when you look down at your hands
Remember to say grace 
And remember to give thanks
Because this is brutally beautiful

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