Bedtime Bully

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Jamie Lockman

3:30

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Very sleepy
I slide into bed
There to meet me
Well it's my nemesis

Laid out discreetly
Softly she stirs
Wide awake completely
Beneath deeply sleeping her

Face feeler
She locks onto me
Space stealer
She talks in her sleep

Pulling covers
Pushed to the brink
I discover as I shove her
Sleeping beauty's freaking moody

Why you getting pissy
Rolling over here to hit me
With an elbow to the side of my head (shot whatcha got)
When you sleep diagonal 
Do you know the blanket's tangled?
Are you comfy on my side of the...
Bedtime Bully
Stretched out fully

Bedtime Bully
Stop bullying me
Bedtime bully
The pillow top queen
Stretched out fully
Princess and the pea
Bedtime bully
No covers for me

Mr. Sandman
Come for me quick
Nyquil and sleeping pills
Ain't doing the trick

Mr. Sandman
Take me away
Melatonin, can't condone
The bully tactics, full theatrics

Like some nocturnal ninja
You come, I learned, and then ya
Distract me, pillow jack me 
And slide to the dark side

Posturepedic princess
Accosted me, and then just
Rolled over cold shoulder
Good night, night Nancy, fancy panties

Bedtime Bully
Stop bullying me
Bedtime bully
The pillow top queen
Stretched out fully
Princess and the pea
Bedtime bully
No covers for me

There's no baby on the front lawn
No spirit rising up john
The big knife killer is gone
Me, I'm lying here beside you
Wide awake confined to
Let the sleep take you away

I guess I'll stay awake, get up and take
A shower, half an hour
I'll slip back and hit the sack for an
Encore once more
Wrapped up in the bedspread
Tossing slaps at my head
Proclaiming I'm to blame
You say I've been snoring, now it's morning

Bedtime Bully
Stop bullying me, hey, hey
Bedtime bully
The pillow top queen, your highness
Stretched out fully
Princess and the pea, stop bullying me
Bedtime bully
No covers for me

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