Cursed Life (feat. Josh Hankin)

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Deepheelaz

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Family tree ain't growing like it used to
Ill never understand the things that u do
My mind hazy I can't get a grip
Life is like a roller coaster and I'm finna slip
Outta my seat u should take one and let me calm down
Anxiety making life fucking hard now
U say u relate but u focused on the need to be great u ain't up late mind running while u Shake 
Listening to nas just to numb my mind
Tripping at the fact that u will never be mine
I get it ok I overthink a lot
I tell myself otherwise but really u is a thot
Putting up shop in my mind and blowing it up
Like leave me alone u know I'm already fucked
Tell me to suck it up like u ain't been thru this
Rapping to the beat as I fade into abyss
Kinda need the guidelines I found in u
So now I'm lost in time and space like the world has skewed
Now I'm back at the jetty thinking look at the view
Thought we'd spent some time together but I kinda fucking knew 
That we would part our ways
While u part ur braids
And I'm draining 3's but don't celebrate 
Coz u ain't there cheering at my game
So with a w I'm still feeling shame

Ye aye
Now it's my turn, to see where I go
Tossing and turning, taking shit slow
If life was rlly fair, could say I wouldn't care
In the morning (click, sky looking blue, (click,click)
All it makes me do's think about you
Coz I'm walkin down the left lane (click,click)
Head spinning in a lot of pain
Failing to breathe, I just wanna leave
Falling of the god damn edge, left to grieve
Writin this new stuff, while I sit and dream
About you, 24/7 365
Don't even know if, your dead or alive
We always fight, u fail to admit it
Make me yell, then I loose it
I was so happy, when i found u
All the days, with my arm around you
All the nights, I couldn't sleep
Writing these songs, so deep
Sitting alone, crying scared
Shaking now, Coz u no longer cared
The dark lies, told to my face
Hurt like crazy, such a disgrace
Goes behind my back, it'll come back to bite u
Wasn't my place, I never meant to spite u

See it had been a week, since we said goodbye
Departed ways, friendship bout to die
Looking at my instagram
It's so empty, " God damn!"
Without Ur touch I feel so numb
Remember the day u took me for a Scum?
See this boy ain't dumb
He knows what's happening
Cant u see girl, I'm even rappin it
Coz I ain't having it
Always treated like dirt
Full of hate and lots of hurt
Confused, what happened, loved what we were
Now all we are is a fucking shit stir
My Life now, is one big curse
It Never gets better, just gets worse
After our explosion
It was all slow motion
Was the end of the ride
U ran away u tried to hide
But I don't care, if u a fan or a hater
I ain't goanna date her, so girl, see later
Even tho I'm berely Coping
Now I'm free, out in the open

So ye, u Left a hole in my heart, wish i could tell you how it felt
U Left me to stand, fall over then melt
All I can say, is everything's perplexed
Hurts even more when u dumped me over text
Now a week feels like forever
Loneliness, when we aren't together
I know I wasn't perfect, I know this wasn't right
Can we stop, be gentle and try not to Fight?
Trust me I cannot let go
Find another girl, "he'll no"
See the word's, "plenty more fish in the sea" are a lie
All there is are sharks, and I ain't that guy
Who gives up, so quick
Not like u, who just quit
We coulda sorted this out, without a doubt
U walked away after we shout
I guess now, I'm all alone
By myself scrolling through my phone
Tryna win u back, is like walking a hill
Gotta be careful and have the skill
To make u smile, for me again
I love u, don't use those words in vain

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