Habits (feat. Manikz)

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Jordan Avitan

3:35

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My emotions, they be lead by blindness
And I'm so loud, cause I hate the silence
And I get attached so god damn easy
I'm convinced that no one really needs me
I need to fix my fucking thoughts
I need help
I try to tell them to f*ck off
And be myself
I look to the sky 
And never down low
You act so fake like a TV show
And my heads in the clouds I'm dreaming of better days
Where you don't need to leave 
I promise you can stay
I want to be on top well you might have guessed
And I sometimes think that I am fucking blessed
Well I got high expectancies
Get them A's and B's
I'm praying you ain't pissed at me
I have my wants and needs 
And I'm a nervous wreck
Well you would never know
I swear I been to hell and back but it only helped me grow

Got a couple habits 
I need to quit
Couple people told me
I can't do this
I'm struggling a lot
And yeah I'll admit
Can't find a way out
I'm in an endless pit
And I got a couple habits 
I need to quit
Couple people told me
I can't do this
I'm struggling a lot
And yeah I'll admit
Can't find a way out
I'm in an endless pit

Drastic habits I know that I need to stop
I feel great in the moment but then in my heart
It feels wrong and I have a conflicted image
Of who and what I am one things a limited edition
Ain't nobody like me cause I do it my way
Steer clear just red deer in headlights on the highway
A mind based on sky based bases chasing a utopia
Of what is real and not a augmented euphoria
Created by myself cause laziness is blissful
Physically, mentally and spiritually disabled
From my self respect, love and abilities
Rather then enabling my capabilities
It's killing me knowing I do things I hate
I try to be in control but it takes
Grabbing a hold of goals and mistakes
Learning from failures you know what I'm saying
I never would of made it for not changing
Pain embrace it move on stagnence
Is the worst killer out of them all
Go out and do it get up when you fall

Got a couple habits 
I need to quit
Couple people told me
I can't do this
I'm struggling a lot
And yeah I'll admit
Can't find a way out
I'm in an endless pit
And I got a couple habits 
I need to quit
Couple people told me
I can't do this
I'm struggling a lot
And yeah I'll admit
Can't find a way out
I'm in an endless pit

I got a lot of thoughts that are just circling my brain 
I got to many restrictions I feel like I'm in chains
Forgot about my past man I poured it down the drain
Try to work on myself so I don't just go insane
Well there's a few things that I have trouble comprehending
And how I'm praying that I don't have a bitter ending
And how I hate people that are constantly pretending 
And how the fucking future is suddenly impending
Well you got no idea all the things I can achieve
And all the secret tricks that I keep hidden up my sleeve
I like to think I'm perfect
I'm lovely
I'm charming 
I heard that I'm the opposite
I find that fact alarming
I'm always tryna do my best
Always trying to impress
All these habits got me stressed
Another pain that fills my chest
I'm worrying what others think
Anxious every time I blink
Living like I'm on the brink
Sipping down another drink

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