Everything Bagel

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Joey Bread

2:42

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Big dick bandit like the Hamburglar
The victim's a ham sandwich, I ain't even heard of her
John Wick got the shit end of the stick, but he's a murderer
I've seen a lot of crazy shit you'd think that I'm from Florida
Getting so rich, my hallways turn into corridors
I'm killing it always, more earnings for the coroner
So I got me a finder's fee, your girl says you're boring her
Head so eloquent, she call herself an orator
I'm like an elephant, I don't forget
You think Mike Pence might repent for nights spent with nice men?
Where's he been without his wife with him, that's a sin
Don't leave the closet door open, I think that's where he's hiding
I'm the new Poseidon make waves no trident
I'm not a violent guy, but I'll sink your ship like pirates
Loose lips pistol on my hip, still smiling,
Your shit it isn't it, but it's aight, 'cause mine is 

Why do they call 'em everything bagels?
I mean...there's like 3 things on 'em
If that were really everything...
Shit...
Excuse me for a moment 

I'm riding shotgun with your mom in a new Buick
Exchanging sophisticated conversation and fluids
I saw the ball in the end zone before I threw it
I told myself, stop looking at memes, follow your dreams, so I'mma do it
I'm producing Sploosh like Stanley Yelnats when he got loose
You can tell that to Fox News
I'm a yellow-spotted lizard in the booth
I spit the deadly truth, I rhyme like Dr. Seuss
I practice medicine like Dr. Dre
If you think this is a fable like Aesop, you're way off
Remember when Travolta took Nic Cage's face-off
And remember when the Browns last made it to the playoffs
Long term investments payoff, ask Bernie Madoff

And rest in peace to getting sleep
I'm working like a dog, and bitches are in heat 
Got the whole crowd in stitches, all y'all eyes on me
You can try to top that; I'm a Mac, y'all PCs
I could be more PC; I'd probably sell more CDs
But most of y'all have never heard or even seen a CD
They told me radio's king, so I put my shit on CB
And now the truckers know me, y'all motherfuckers is weak, yeah
I'm so hard to read I'm like the fine print
I don't f*ck with trash like the environment
You should take your tracks and put 'em on consignment
I'mma hold you back till you're in rap retirement

Yeah, y'all can stream my consciousness, I'm on some William Faulkner shit
I pop champagne that's proper shit, baked like that Betty Crocker shit
I'm Caitlyn Jenner's daughter rich, except I ain't got the fullest lips
Of course I am just full of shit, not pushing weight I'm pulling it
I'm full of it, but that's just cause I'm dope as f*ck
I opened up a show for the pope and stole his audience
I told a joke, and I've been feeling naughty since
I met a girl who played the cello, now I know what Lil Yachty meant

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