Break Down

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Outcast 20/20

3:15

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 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer

At the age of 14 
I started writing rhymes 
That's when I decided it was time 
To use it as an outlet 
I was goin' 
Through some stuff 
From relationships 
Not big enough 
To mental abuse 
Overflowin' my cup 
I didn't know how to express my mess 
So I started to write down 
What was in my head 
I started to work 
On my first album 
No beats 
Just rhymes 
My head was crowded 
I like to reminisce about dudes 
I listened to 
And still do 
I listen to rap like Tobymac 
And then I go and elevate to Lecrae 
Tobymac's Irean was the first real rap 
That I can relate with that 
Yeah...
I remember the days 
Just chillin 
Listenin' to music 
Forgetting about life 
And all the bruises 
But it didn't last long 
It was just a temporary song 
I had to fall back 
Into His arms 
I 
Wasn't sure 
If I was ever gonna get right in my mind 
I didn't know how to cope 
I never tried drugs 
I barely drank 
Spiritually, I was running 
An empty tank 
God was still trying to keep me holy 
When I was still tryin to do those things 
Everything came 
In my way 
I got invited to parties 
But I couldn't stay 
Cus they arrested somebody 
But what else can I say? 
There was one day 
When everything finally changed... 
And no way 
I'm goin' back to my old days 
You showed me 
Brighter days 
You stay in the fight 
You're right by my side 
When you're never the same 
I decided to change 
Influence of the King 
I was always different 
I gotta embrace those days 
I gotta chase those ways 
I gotta win the race 
And keep on fighting 
Never give up those days 
What am I trying to say? 
I never felt right 
About smoking' weed 
Even just to take the edge off 
People say it's okay 
Even in my family 
I won't condemn or judge 
But just don't ask me 
How many times do I gotta say 
I'm different then most 
I gotta find new ways to cope 
I was lost for most of my life 
Even though I was tryin to find 
Who I am in Christ 
Life knocked me down 
I was only 6 
When these walls were starting to build around 
My own mind 
I was fragile and broken 
When my sister died 
I was still hopeful 
But a couple years later 
On Christmas Day 
My brother died 
And I was never the same 
I resented God
But that was not the way 
And if you're hearin this 
Maybe you're going through the same thing 
Trust in God and he'll get it right 
On his time 
All you're doin is just building a crown 
So what can I say now? 
My ways are changed now 
When this is my break down...

 Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer