If You Really Loved Me
Tim Minchin
The easy, fast & fun way to learn how to sing: 30DaySinger.com
If you really loved me, the way you say you do If you love me half as much as I love you You would pluck a planet from the sky You would use a star to dot the “i” In I love you, that is what you’d do You'd take a dreary day and you would paint it blue If you loved me unconditionally These are the things that you would do for me Because I need you Like a fish needs a sea Like a fire needs oxygen Like a flower needs a bee And if you really cared for me You’d let me video you while you wee Standing up in the bath, I shouldn’t even have to ask Perhaps you’d even store a little more in a flask These are just the things that people do When their love for one another is true Ba da da We go together Like a cracker and brie Like racism and ignorance Like bling and RnB And if you really want to show you care You’d let me wear your underwear When we visit your mum's, it's a bit of harmless fun I just like talking about your childhood with some lace between my buns There’s no reason for a big to-do If your love for one another is true Ba da da We go together Like a bird in a nest Like Internet and porn Like guns and the US And if you love me like you say that you do You'd purchase forty cockatoo And teach them to fly, in formation in the sky And shit the words “Tim is God” on my ex-girlfriend’s Hyundai Sure, it might be easier with doves But shirking challenges is not what love's all about Love is not all wine and roses Sometimes it’s handcuffs and cheese No-one said love is for free And if you agree with that You'll sing me passages from the Koran Wearing nothing but a Bob the Builder hat To the tune of waltzing Matilda I just love the combination of Islam, nationalism and builder (Builder) (Yeah) (Islam) (Nationalism) (And a little bitty builder) (Islam) (Aussie Aussie Aussie) (And Bob the fucking Builder) (LIKE BOB THE FUCKING BUILDER) Because I need you Like a tick needs a tock Like bananas need pyjamas Like a nun needs cock But if you want to put your love for me first You wouldn’t go through childbirth You’d agree to adopt, so that you could stay thin We’ll get a Chinese kid, it could teach us Mandarin And communists don’t make as much noise And they’re really good at sharing their toys Because I dig you Like an Aussie digs pies Like Born-agains dig Jesus Like Jesus dug guys And if you love me unconditionally You’d do my tax return for me 'Cause it’s way overdue, and I just don’t know, I guess I’m self-employed but do I still pay as I go? And does the threshold apply to me? And should I register for GST? And if you love me unconditionally Would you let me video you while you wee? Assuming there's nothing worth watching on the TV
Become A Better Singer In Only 30 Days, With Easy Video Lessons!
Written by: Tim Minchin
Lyrics © Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Citation
Use the citation below to add these lyrics to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"If You Really Loved Me Lyrics." Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 30 Apr. 2024. <https://www.lyrics.com/lyric-lf/4122638/Tim+Minchin/If+You+Really+Loved+Me>.
Discuss the If You Really Loved Me Lyrics with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In