I'm Supposed to Be Perfect

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Shius

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In this imperfect world, I thought I was the exception
In this imperfect life, I thought I'd be God
These delusions I feel, once bright and incandescent
Make my reality seem as if I'm losing it
In a person I once was, I still live
In a brain that deceives me, I still exist
Time goes on and I feel as if I'm seeing things
The God I once knew says they can't keep me from hearing them
All past, my time swept aside, I'm still here
All my memories make me who I am today
Call me ill or insane, you won't take this from me
A single thought that I was not supposed to end like this
I'm supposed to be perfect

And then a riot ensues
And then I wish I were you
And then a riot ensues
I'm supposed to be
And then a riot ensues
And then I wish I were you
And then a riot ensues
I'm supposed to be perfect

In a healthy demeanor, you cannot see I'm inane
To my own hallucinations, I know that I'm insane
All these labels I'm given, deteriorate who I am
All the illness has taken, will not be given back
I know my fate is to live, as if I'm strong enough
To fight against what I can't see, what I can only hear
I have to make things right, or die and hold my peace
I cannot lose tonight, I still refuse to die
Because the God that I know, they're still here by my side
They tell me things aren't perfect, but that I'll be alright
All these shadows I'm attached to will not take me away
I will not kill myself until I see another day

And then a riot ensues
And then I wish I were you
And then a riot ensues
I was supposed to be
And then a riot ensues
And then I wish I were you
And then a riot ensues
I was supposed to be

Sleepless nights I'm awake, I consider my options
I keep on holding onto hope as if there's any for me
Yet on these silent nights, I resist giving in
To all the demons that I know cannot be real for you
It's a painful reaction, when I cannot see
The numbing of what I've gone through, what you haven't felt
But when the voices and the shadows out the corner of my eye
Say I cannot be like them, I cannot help but cry
All this pain and confusion, miscommunicate intentions
I am not a God, I am barely a person
I can't give up the fight, I won't just live for tonight
Even when the silence kills me, I will not die

And then a riot ensues
And then a riot ensues
And then a riot ensues
I was supposed to be
And then a riot ensues
And then a riot ensues
And then a riot ensues
I was supposed to be perfect

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