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3x-OG

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First things first
I just need to say that I'm sorry for hiding from you
So scared of your thoughts what were you going to do
First I said I was K
Then I started decaying 
And praying
Instead of facing my sin I started lying to you 
Thought a little was Ok got this in my control 
Then it was none to frequent and I was on a roll
Than what do you know
Ruining my soul
Didn't know where to go
Like bro I just couldn't say no
Inside I was crying
To my sin I was dying 
Couldn't tell the dealer to stop dealing If I was buying
Knew I was a christian but my insides were sighing 
Instead of being a mighty river I was drying 
Then, everything I said was hypocritical 
Knew if good had a rating than mine would be minimal
But I still rhymed all the time acted like it was fine 
But you were right I mean I rap but my living was critical
Those were some dark days suicide was an option
The Only reason I didn't was cause of my conscience 
Broke the Holy Spirit a very long time ago
Thought that I could do this but I couldn't though
And I know your probably wondering what is this for
Why I Rap please I will let you know
My father God inside me even as I flow
And when I trip up he's there to catch me as I fall
I just don't want you guys to treat me any different 
This isn't a protest restrictions I get it
And actually I want cause it is good for me
Still the same kid who ran up the stairs with his socks honey
Still the same kid who loves to share the gospel
But I slip up and I trip up and I fall into some dark holes
Still love passing out tracks evangelism week
Same way I did when I shared with kids when I was in SEEK
Still love the Bible even when I don't read it
This isn't an excuse I still need my feeding
Everybody screws up please don't be made
Just want to have fun conversations with my dad
I really wanna have a relationship with my mom
Who I'll be around as much before I'm out the house and gone
Just want me to be me, and you to be you
No obstacles in the way, people or YouTube 
I don't wanna start over, just pick up where Ive left
And I wouldn't want to trade you because my family is the best
About to rap up but not stop my music 
Have to keep writing the way God have me moving look
The guy last night just wasn't me
Satan using me like a dolley
But Imma keep writing 
Because what happened im past it and all I have to say is Sorry

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