Barry Manilow Got Stuck in Sausage Fibers
ColdmaN5
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Barry Manilow sing me a song A song is all I want to hear But don't just sing me any song Sing me a song of Christmas cheer So Barry got comfy In his leather brown seat And out came his dog Scrumpfy And laid down at his feet Good ol' Barry started strumming On his lucky Ferris Go Wheel guitar Good ol' Barry started humming And tapping his feet on the floor I sat and watched this performance And a tear streamed down my left cheek But tragedy struck without warning And he let out a blood-curdling scream An Italian spider had spun a meaty web And it wrapped around the helpless Barry And I asked as his eyes went wide with dread Manilow are you hurt and he said "very" Pretty soon he had a new home In a stringy meat cocoon And I asked "What do I do" And he replied "Get me outta here soon" So I grabbed a knife from the pantry And I tried in might to cut him loose But the web was tough as hard candy And I said "Barry I think you're screwed" But Barry had a plan in his head One that involved me "Son, grab me my guitar" he said "And I think I can get free" So I ran to his aide and picked up his weapon And he freed up both of his hands He reached for me and I handed it to him And he quickly started to jam He played what seemed like a million-note flurry Quicker than the speed of sight And everything in the room became blurry And there was a flash of white light And it sounded something like this Followed by the loud sound of a boom I was scared and closed my eyes tight Couldn't see but from what I heard I assume Mr. Manilow put up a fight When I opened them a few moments later I saw Mr. Manilow was free And I asked him how he did what I did And he said "Stranger that's between you and me" With a friendly wave goodbye We went back to our separate lives And I never thought I'd see him again Then ten years later I got a call on my cell And it was Barry on the other end I said "Why did you call please do tell" He said "I never forgot you my friend I was wondering if I could swing by some day And maybe grab a bite to eat" Without even thinking I said "Okay How about some time next week" Before we knew it that day came And he was standing at my door I looked at his car parked in my driveway A classic Chevy Fifty-Four Then I looked back up in Manilow's eyes He had tears streaming down his face I asked "Barry why why must you cry" He said "Son I have something to say I'll never forget how you saved my life And I owe all I've done to you You could have sat by and watched me die But you knew just what to do" With that the old man broke down And fell into my arms So I walked him over to the couch And sat him gently on the arm After a little while Barry began to unwind And we sat ate joked and laughed All about days gone by Suddenly the mood went from fun to grave As he motioned toward the floor "Oh my God what is that please get it away" I looked to see the source One little bug scurrying around So innocent and cute "Stomp it kill it now" So I smashed it with my shoe Poor Barry was now in hysterics And it took me forever to calm him down I thought that he would cry himself sick So I gave him drugs to knock him out Three days later I called his agent To see what in the world was wrong At first I couldn't get him to say it Then he started the story along "Ten years ago ever since that day Poor Barry I tell you just hasn't been the same Every time he sees a spider It just reminds him Reminds him of the time He got stuck in sausage fibers"
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"Barry Manilow Got Stuck in Sausage Fibers Lyrics." Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 11 May 2024. <https://www.lyrics.com/lyric-lf/4676578/ColdmaN5/Barry+Manilow+Got+Stuck+in+Sausage+Fibers>.
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