Afraid

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Ross Grieb

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As I write these words by candlelight
I wonder where you're at tonight
I'm safe secure at home I could have died
I haven't prayed in weeks but today I might
And yeah I know
That nothing's fair
And since you died I've wondered
What it means for me to care
About the people in my life
I say I love but never seem to love enough
I'm not enough

I'm not afraid of dying, no
I'm not afraid of dying
I'm terrified that nothing I did here matters at all
I've been looking for the words
To say that I feel powerless to change
The thought that nothing I could do would really matter anyway

Is it selfish that I feel this way?
I was worried 'bout myself that day
I'm sorry I can never find the time
To let myself lay down my life
This isn't right
If we're all just running from the end
Why am I in my bed
Doing nothing, just trying not to die young
Yeah we've been a little out of touch
Hadn't seen you in months
Now I'm sorry that I'll never see your face again

I'm not afraid of dying, no
I'm not afraid of dying
I'm terrified that nothing I did here matters at all
I've been looking for the words
To say that I feel powerless to change
The thought that nothing I could do would really matter anyway

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