Insecurities

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Idealist

Idealism in philosophy, also known as philosophical idealism or metaphysical idealism, is the set of metaphysical perspectives asserting that, most fundamentally, reality is equivalent to mind, spirit, or consciousness; that reality is entirely a mental construct; or that ideas are the highest form of reality or have the greatest claim to being considered "real". The radical latter view is often first credited to the Ancient Greek philosopher Plato as part of a theory now known as Platonic idealism. Besides in Western philosophy, idealism also appears in some Indian philosophy, namely in Vedanta, one of the orthodox schools of Hindu philosophy, and in some streams of Buddhism. Epistemologically, idealism is accompanied by philosophical skepticism about the po… more »

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I can't make my demons go away
I guess my demons are here to stay

Life is filled with too many uncertainties
All the little things always be hurting me
I focus way too much on my impurities
I'm a fucking slave to my insecurities
Am I good enough for the people I cherish
Do I dress ok, do I like the way my hair is
Why the f*ck am I so obsessed with appearance
Why the f*ck am I so afraid of getting embarrassed
I'm a slave to my emotion
So up and down like an ocean
My minds a ticking time bomb
And there's about to be an explosion
Why do I give such a f*ck about what other people think
The more I do that the more I drink
I'm on a boat in an ocean of emotion and I'm about to sink
I take every little situation and overthink
I can't fall asleep at night because I'm already dreaming
I fantasize and idealize everything those are my demons
I burn way to many bridges with no other way of crossing
These thoughts digging deep into me at night I'm turning and tossing
I never think I'm good enough no matter what I do
I'm never good enough and apparently not for you
You deepened my insecurities every single day
And I guess through all that with you I can't be placing the blame
I do this to myself, f*ck, I do it to myself
I compare my achievements to everybody else
So when I look at them and they're doing great
I feel so happy for them but deep down I'm feeling fucking hate
Not hate for them it's hate for me
Hate that I'm not good enough but in actuality
I'm doing fine, I'm doing fine
I'm living a good life
But somewhere in my head I hear a dirty lie
That me accomplishments are nothing next to those around me
And it tears me apart cuz those thoughts are so confounding

I can't make my demons go away
I guess my demons are here to stay

Happiness has eluded me but I think that I should try it
I'm sick of falling asleep alone in my bed crying
And my friends don't say shit about it like they miming
I wonder if they would care if I ended up dying
I tried to put on a brave face and keep smiling
But deep down in my heart I know I'm lying
She was texting me back for a while then she stopped replying

They ask are you ok
What am I supposed to say
Thoughts dark deep in my brain
Can't keep my thoughts contained
Been dealing with this
For a minute for a day for a year
Been learning to live with it
But it's hard to hide all my tears
I've been lonely I've been sad
I keep it all to myself
Do you know me are you mad
I put it on the top shelf
Keep it out of reach
I fear my feelings
Don't do too much healing
Take my lips and seal it
Always concealing
Never truly dealing

Happiness has eluded me but I think that I should try it
I'm sick of falling asleep alone in my bed crying
And my friends don't say shit about it like they miming
I wonder if they would care if I ended up dying
I tried to put on a brave face and keep smiling
But deep down in my heart I know I'm lying
She was texting me back for a while then she stopped replying

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