Dear Mr Darwin

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Smige

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Dear Mr Darwin, I'm writing this to say
I've managed to disprove your theory
A set of observations I've made along my way
Have led me to produce these queries

I understand that the giraffes which have the longest necks
Are most likely to find food and thus survive and then have sex
But explain to me why men who have a mental age of three
Are the only ones who procreate, and hence pass on their genes? 

And if our destinies are predetermined by our DNA
Why am I the only one alone on planet Earth today? 

Dear Mr Darwin, morons inhabit the Earth
And just judging by their presence, evolution hasn't worked
And yet somehow in the midst of this I've managed to survive
But if what you said was true then why the hell are they alive?
Why the hell are they alive?

Now let's suppose, just hypothetically, that God exists
And this growth in sexual misconduct made him slightly pissed
And so he thought he'd get his sweet revenge by making a disease
He could wipe out all these fuckers by inventing STDs

But the Lord was no match for mankind, 'cause we learned how to cheat
And so, courtesy of Durex, God was brought to his defeat. 

Dear Mr Darwin, morons inhabit the Earth
And just judging by their presence, evolution hasn't worked
And yet somehow in the midst of this I've managed to survive
But if what you said was true then why the hell are they alive?
Why the hell are they alive?
Haven't you noticed?

And I suppose it's no surprise that man descended from the ape
We both share the core survival skills: to eat, kill and rape
And yesterday I saw two chimpanzees while I was at the zoo
And as they screwed in their own filth, they reminded me of you

Oh, Dear Mr Darwin, morons inhabit the Earth
And just judging by their presence, evolution hasn't worked
And yet somehow in the midst of this I've managed to survive
But if what you said was true then why the hell are they alive?
Why the hell are they alive?

Oh dear, oh dear, Mr Darwin, fornication leads to birth
Which I suppose helps to explain to us why morons rule the Earth
And yet somehow in the midst of this I've managed to survive
But if what you said was true then why the hell are they alive? 
Why the hell are they alive?

And in conclusion, I have found a negative correlation
Between a man's IQ and the frequency of his ejaculations

Haven't you noticed?

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