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Glance of Medusa

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Am I supposed to keep struggling but still captivated by the pain?
It's something I can't control, something unknown, as broken wishes falling to the ground

Everything's changing and I'm not sure what is going to happen next
Something is just wrong with the path I've walked and the walls I've build
I said I'll find my way through the darkness and misery but now 
The fortress is falling apart with empty words echoing 

I wish that you could see through me, the absence of colors in my life
Now give me something, can you see the absence of colors in my life?

Am I supposed to keep struggling but still captivated by the pain?
It's something I can't control, something unknown, as broken wishes falling to the ground

Now give me something I'm longing for, I wouldn't matter being six feet underground
I lost a part of me when I was young and naive, now let nothing remain in the end
I was told that the light will always shine and there are better days ahead
What are the odds to still feel alive? Conscience's numb

I can't remember if there was a time that I felt whole 
I can't pretend that I accept the fact that all the sanity is gone

I will shut my eyes to what I wished to avoid, this remedy that's only there to soothe
What is wrong with preaching pain when you know it's there?
This plague is in my blood, it's in my blood

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