Goodbye\\Good riddance

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Jsteezzy

3:43

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Talking to man up in the mirror
Vision too blurry wish it was clearer
Judging the way I wish he was thinner
But as he got older got bigger and bigger
Underdog see he never a winner
Catalogue out of order like error
Constantly wishing he looked a lil different
He prolly could f*ck but the women won’t let him
So insecurities taking over these thoughts of growing trees
I stay in shade of the darkness the pain is the hardest
And low is the target where comfort is mostly felt
Momma told me that I’m a one of a kind
It’s just me all by myself, being special lowkey lonely
Use to wish to be everyone else
Harder to picture the image of nigga in mirror that ain’t getting clearer
No matter the clippers the barber the artist
Who constantly fading the thoughts of losing me
Missing the way that I used to smile
Swear I ain’t seen that shit inna while
It’s quite a distance walking 8 mile
It wasn’t moments more like lifestyle
Now I am changing most of my ways
Like swerving 290 heading to stony
Cause granny the person the woman to told me
That being real you is all you can be
Member them days living on school street
Me, momma, grandma being a family
I swear when I say it since I moved away I ain’t been same Since 2015
Now I’m saying goodbye
That’s real damage up inside
When I’m in public I’m the funny guy
When I go home I wanna cry
They say a jokes a great disguise
I hoped people ain’t realize
That the real joke I tried to hide
I loved myself in the inside
I ain’t even ask for some advice
I was too scared for sacrifice
Being so numb to being too vulnerable
Ego denied it not surprised
Ever felt stapled onto your bed
Because the outside just isn’t nice
But when it’s the bashing
Constantly asking
Questions no answers
Are you alright?
Now I’m saying goodbye
Cause I can’t go into adult life with all weight all up in my mind with all this pain
And all this strife
All this mental real bad state how do I change my way of life
Kept this shit all up inside cause I was scared of sacrifice
Thought this music shit would help but I still kept that in mind
Wasn’t ready to face them demons that I’m fighting all the time
Even when I sought out Jesus still ain’t feel presence of god
I send up prayers does he do hear me if he does why no reply
Now I’m saying goodbye
And good riddance
Cause constant depression just ain’t living
Cause you the hero of your own story
But depression when you also the villain
Noticed I got more seconds in life than I do have those minutes
This that glass half full type verse on that half empty is what I’m sipping
And I’ll admit it I ain’t perfect but I’m working on imperfects imma person but I’m learning And I’m turning up my limits
If it’s one thing I learned from COVID you get one chance betta not quit it
To become human against all the odds it was you versus 44 trillion
Imma go chase my dreams and finally love doing those things
Imma smile and learn to love me cause that’s real love never phony
And even tho I got homies a nigga still feel like he lonely
But when you built a lil different ain’t many people being there closely
Wearing hoodies every season cause the people cause insecurity
Listening to loud music just to tune out the world G
Trying to hide all that shit through security or immaturity
But this a letter that I’m writing done hiding this the real me
And good riddance
Now I’m saying goodbye
And good riddance
Now I’m saying goodbye
And good riddance
Now I’m saying goodbye
And good riddance

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