Eulogy for the 2 of Me

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CoaastGxd

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My faith has been shaken
Everything that I love has been taken
And the love in my eyes is a fear that now lies deep inside and my souls been forsaken
My heart is an enemy racing
As I wait and I pace in the station
Dear god please take me away from this life or this day or this always in pain shit
But he never responded, nah
Not now or the end
So I'll never belong and the demon I carry will always be my only friend
Till all of me cannot defend
I never do this for the trend
I'll probably fly off and hide before I end up taking my life out of sight
In the night
No, I'm not alright
You know you toyed inside my mind
I can feel my personality splitting
One side all wall-eyed
The other the devil maniacally grinning
Baptized in hate like I was made for unjustifiable sinning
Capsized and irate enough to tear you apart where you're sitting
It's only fitting
If I had known right from the beginning
That I would be giving and giving but never fulfilling
For killing us or was it you the unwilling
For giving up all of the love I'm instilling
Or mopping up all of the blood I've been spilling
Reliving my wrongs but never forgiving
Cunt(I hate myself)
I fucking love you,
But I hate you
You're the best at putting me in an irate mood
And anxiety is quietly rebuilding up inside of me
Suppressed by xannys, rye, and weed
I'm tired please just let me sleep
I close my eyes accept the fate of deaths untrue embrace
But even in death all I can see is your mother fucking face
And then I wake
My heart it howls and it aches
And tears run down my face
As my self esteem deflates
Wondering how you could just negate
All the love was it just fake?
Well f*ck you too bitch, cause I'm about to break
Soul mates? What about we?
You've created a violent me
Now get to sleeping with the fishes at the bottom of the sea

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