You Are Kolley Kibber And I Demand My Five-Pound Note

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The Spanish Amanda

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Man of the people, Mr Cummings
Well, I've been trying to read your mind
I sense you've got a plan for me
And my particular talents
Pierre Bourdieu - he's on the line
He say he'll hold, he's doing fine
On the other side from me
In his clinic in Paris
He always said he could sense
Twenty marks of privilege
And there's your telltale fingerprints
On the pastis bottle in his fridge
And your diplomatic number plates
Just seem a trifle rich
Pack up that Landy, drive away

Man of the people, Tommy Robinson
Look at the frescos on your wall
They say it all, we think they're swell
In all their monochrome glory
Paul from the Jam just sent this fax
You've got his licks, he wants them back
I'm sitting comfortably, let's begin
Your unbelievable story
I always knew I could smell
Twenty scents of privilege
And there's a bum note in your cologne
That really makes my eyeballs twitch
And what plays well on B Wing
Won't help you get down with the kids
Back up to Luton with you, Tom

I didn't get the education to escape a proper job
When all I ever wanted was to be an art school snob
But I have learned to live with it - can you live with it, Bob?
Hey, Bobby, where's my backstage pass?

Man of the people, Mr Laurence
Tell us that rags to riches tale
It never fails to make us smile
When you do the faces and voices
You say that you were raised by Foxes
What's in a species or a name?
You're not to blame, you never are
For your ridiculous choices
I always thought I could tell
Twenty shades of privilege
But I fell down the rabbit hole
When I stumbled on your YouTube vids
And I couldn't help but be impressed
At how your foxhounds tear apart a snitch
I think it's time I called you out 

So I say 
You are Kolley Kibber and I demand my five pound note
Yes, Laurence, you are Kolley Kibber and I demand my five pound note
And Tommy, you also are Kolley Kibber and I demand my five-pound note
And Dominic, you are Kolley Kibber and I demand my five-pound note right now

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