Bodega Baby

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Ntatao

3:26

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The story starts back in Denver City
A close community of farmers harvesting self pity
Driven by agriculture
We valued our land and suffered for rand
But all the memories causing mad nostalgia
A pinch of pride and just a dash of culture
Shaped half a man out of me
Now vultures prey
On my decayed
Self esteem
My Soft exterior might have to rupture
Flow sharp as needles pierce through every beat
See raps my acupuncture
Therapeutic I'm still a student at most
Considered as a eunuch my sheets were filling with ghosts
What a rough patch
Streets were cold
Flooded by a blood bath
Of f*ck niggas slaying queens and
I admit I was outmatched
Then a thought passed
You only 14 you'll get enough ass
Scrotum barely dropped
You bustin' nutmegs
Fast forward years later collecting hunnies like thumbtacks
Pressing up on anybody's daughter
Behinds their mahns back
Until their mahns back
Now you're staring down the barrel of the devils gun
Fire in his eyes and probably faded off the rum
Probably looking for a reason to catch a fade on anyone
Now you dragged you pussy ass all up in this you better run
Faster than the speed I made my way
Taking all kinds of mood enhancers to make it through this day
Went from an observer to just spectate
Other people's life's
Man I was dead weight
Waiting for the moment I could then shake hands
With my reality
Look at him eye to eye
Abandoning every instinct to duck and hide
From El Diablo, Satan
Former pagan
Since about grade 10
But the further I ran away I could still resort to an amen
Hey man
I know your off the heights but let me lay hands
Hold you down
Cause when no ones around
You often take ten
Shots to the brain
Blocking the pain
Grind for the change
Fingers to the world screaming f*ck to the fame

How do I deal with the death of the woman that raised me
How do I let this tragic moment not severe nor break me
Is it because we grew apart why the news didn't shake me
Or did I try make peace with the loss way before taking
My 1st step my worst step in the light
I navigate through the pain barely putting up a fight but the world is still turning, my fire's Barely burning
Skyf tos
Lemme ignite a new desire for life
For I space off
Into a new realm
The perfect purgatory
That's the new hell
Not knowing who are
What you want an empty vessel
I was
Sailing towards the shore not even fucking sure
If I loved what I do on a daily
Or it's my arrogance
Yearn for happiness Trapped
By insecurities
The fact that I can see right through the you
Means you could see through me
Soul beat down fucking Bruced
By either Wayne or Lee
Never found my light at the tunnel end it just beamed through me
Been crying my whole life
But why can't I shed a single tear on this faithful night
Hana monna ke nku
Probably been the biggest lie I've told
Compared to any of these rap niggas boy I'm 10fold
And after everything my family ever gifted me I'm glad I rhymed
Still got the type hunger a million meals won't satisfy
So lemme try
Squeeze ya left lung
So you can breathe right
Pay homage to the gang taught me how to perceive life
Thank You

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