Reflection

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Goodphella

3:19

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Give me the bottle and I'll drown
My tears away
My tears away
Give me a second to believe
It's worth the pain

I remember feeling so alive
Like oh my God i survived
Fear of death justified
What if they buried me with naked wrists
Like I ran out of time
Clenched fists the Arthur of the story
With a bride watching her whole life turn cold
Plotline for a Lifetime
Shit ain't discriminatory
It borders on utopian allegory
Dystopian depiction like Bridgerton
Am I putting the erotic in neurotic
Like I'm fucking ballistic honestly I doubt it
Paranoia to a gadabout, shit
The anxiety forget about it
I'm way the f*ck past psychotic
Big Ben with an OCD mind loop trying to block it
But what about when he fails
Panic then internalize it
Throw in a safe and lock it like it was your best friend
But then I'm married to both so how the f*ck this gonna end
Death till us part is a godsend
Unless I ascend

Give me the bottle and I'll drown
My tears away
My tears away

I'm a master of disguise
One percent of me is as it seems like I was taxidermied
Look into my eyes
Never wanted it to be the reflection I despise
Am I classified
As a whiny motormouth from the motor city
Motherfucking maybe
But if I put myself out to pasture in the pasture
Nobody would think of Shady
It's already in doubt
Even though I'm swinging for the fences
Like my name was Mike Trout
Minus a couple hundred million
I don't assume perfection necessary to ascend
Like I'm dressed in vermillion
But that's a lot of unknown Mary Magdalene
I'd probably settle for a million
Present gain become one of a billion
To become one of a billion
Would have to sacrifice being a civilian
Already tried that a couple times
And I don't think I can again
More than rhymes

Give me the bottle and I'll drown
My tears away
My tears away

I've been seeing way too many people compensating
For a lack of self love
And using their ego as lube for masturbating
Tell them to let it go like l'Eggo my Eggo
But they don't think I'm making bacon and assume valid preponderating
So I guess I did it wrong
Like I'm swinging on a noose looped in a door frame like it's my swan song
Open door hear the mahjong
Close call considering how callous and cowardly a casualty would be
No lyin' Dorothy
You wouldn't find a fucking garland on me
Barbiturates in the bloodstream
Like the gates of heaven opened up just for me
Nearly three decades in
Don't have a fucking clue who I'm supposed to be
Rationally the answer is me
But if you ask couldn't say with honesty
That I know me
Universally I don't know anything
And that's what really fucking scares me
And I'm afraid at the end of the day
That's what everyone will say about me

Give me the bottle and I'll drown
My tears away
My tears away
Give me a reason to believe
It's worth the pain

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